Who I Am:

I'm a 31y/o cis guy living in Europe and working remotely, living with two adorable cats. I'm ethically non-monogamous and currently in a happy relationship. Not hunting for unicorns, I speak for myself, not my polycule. Feminist, mostly ace, heteroromantic. Very into BDSM.

My list of kinks could just go on and on and on, but I'll stick to the fundamentals for now. I like switching and I'm fine with either role, although I lean more submissive. I am very much more into the psychological side of things - emotional sadism, humiliation, domination, that sort of thing.

Weakness is what sets my teeth on edge. I love the feeling of defeat, whether I'm inflicting it or being subjected to it. Humiliation, and assertion of authority with relegation of the loser, are my kinky staples. With that said, I'm flexible and always open to new things!

If it sounds like your jam, read on.

What I'm Looking For:

I'm looking for meaningful connections, be it relationships, friends, or play partners/FWB, anywhere in the world.

If you think of yourself as pretty much a nerd for kink, if you enjoy the psychological facets and layers that make power exchange so fascinating... say, that thrilling feeling when the balance of power first begins to tilt. When one participant slowly but inexorably begins to tighten their grip around the other, to change the terms and rewrite the rules...

Then I'd love to hear from you.

While playing is not necessarily a requirement, I would like to create and entertain a connection which includes elements of power exchange, be they light or more serious. I'm fine with exploring this connection and letting it grow organically, rather than specifically aiming for this or that sort of relationship. I'm pretty much open to anything.

I don't have hard and fast limits on age, but I'd prefer if the age gap wasn't bigger than 10yrs. Same goes for location: anywhere is fine, but if you live in the EU, then all the better!

Pics and stuff like that are not an up-front requirement: I myself would prefer to wait until trust is established, and I realise this can take time. As you've gathered, the purely sexual dimension of this is not what really interests me anyway.

Kinks:

Like I said, emotional sadism is perhaps my biggest kink, and arguably the one that influences all the others.

Am I subbing for you, and worshiping your feet and shoes? Tell me why you hold so much power over me. Am I serving you drinks and being a service sub? Explain to me that it's because you're the boss and I'm only fit for a lowly position in life... you get the gist. And you can expect the same from me in return, when I'm topping.

As such, it probably won't surprise you that (in either role) I'm into verbal humiliation/degradation (especially if cruel), gaslighting, hypno, orgasm control, cucking, and so on. On the physical side, I quite like primal wrestling for dominance, as well as worship of hands/feet/shoes/boots. I don't mind collars, leashes, and cuffs. Service subbing and being used as furniture is also high on the list.

As for the somewhat more directly sexual stuff: after a long time playing mostly non-sexually, my list of practices has evolved and I'm in more or less a hybrid position now. I still mostly play non-sexually (or para-sexually I suppose, depending on how you consider stuff like orgasm control), but I'm more open to sexual contact now, especially when I'm topping. Details can always be discussed if we click!

More Info About Me:

What I do for a living is write kinky erotica. I have other, secondary forms of income -still remote work, however.

Outside of the kink aspect: I'm a bit of an introvert. I'm terminally online, and available to chat regularly, since most of my hobbies take place online or indoors.

In my free time, I'm a writer of science fiction and fantasy. I like playing videogames (namedropping a few: Mass Effect, War Thunder, Darkest Dungeon) and board games (my all-time fave being Eldritch Horror!). I regularly read about international politics, conflicts, and contemporary history. I'm a big fan of Sanderson's Cosmere, ASOIAF, and the Cthulhu mythos!

I also watch Formula One, and occasionally other forms of motor racing, and have a bizarre thing for Mesozoic dinosaurs.

ADHD and can talk about mental health/therapy for days on end. And yes, the ADHD part probably explains a few things :D

If any of this sounds appealing, message me with how the post made you feel! I'm always happy to chat.