Howdy.

Preface: For specificity, looking for F, T, or NB folks, not actually A. Sorry gents, not searching for y'all. Blame the bots.

Aiming to build a monogamous long-term D/s relationship. As a Dom with a cherished sub, I would expect to be each other's one and only. Not into the DDlg dynamic, but not opposed to being called 'Daddy' either. Hoping to explore BDSM together and develop our own thing based on our interests, curiosities, experience, and imagination.

Since we're starting online, I'm willing to talk, chat, and maybe play a little. But I'm ultimately looking for someone in person. If my partner isn't local, it would be important if we both shared the responsibility for traveling to and from each other. Not afraid to meet in the middle in most aspects of a relationship.

Anyway. If that fucking preamble hasn't turned you off already, howdy again. Welcome to the shitshow (no, there's no scat here, though I am very vulgar).

I've been interested in BDSM and the lifestyle for a couple years. I want to be more involved in it now that I am more stable in my personal and professional lives. I am very familiar with BDSM, just inexperienced. I need to know if this is something I want as a lifestyle as opposed to simply a form of play. One of my biggest relationship fears is that I end up with a partner who isn't interested in kink, or, worse, finds it disgusting. I don't want to settle and discover I've been cut off from something I crave.

So about me, I guess. I'm a guy, 29, from Louisiana. I graduated in CompSci and have a full time job in tech. I own my own vehicle and home- currently living solo with my dog and cat. I've worked really hard to achieve personal success in most aspects of my life, just didn't do a great job focusing on relationships. That being said, I can come off a bit awkward. It's from inexperience, not timidity. Well, maybe a little shy.

Physically, if you imagine a 'bear' in the community, I am pretty similar. I am 5'10", bearded and quite hairy all around, minus the shaved head. I am a little on the heavier side, but I am not intending to stay this way. (I've been slamming it since March 2023 after recovering from Covid. I got a personal trainer, go to the gym 6 days out of the week. Saturdays or Sundays as rest days. My current trainer is a killer and works me to death but it's great. I jokingly say I want to get big "choke me Daddy" arms so if you're looking to be a pet gym-rat, let me know.)

I'm big on video games and stuff. Very nerdy. I enjoy watching YouTube and movies, playing DnD or TTRPGs (maybe a kinky DnD campaign could be on the horizon?). Started getting back into reading lately. On the weekends I'll go sit at a coffee shop and read some. I've also got other hobbies, but I'll save that for getting to know each other. I also recently started going to therapy, so workin' on the brain too.

Sex wise, as I said, not much experience. We'll keep it at that for now. Kink wise I have a lot of interests. There's not much I'm against outright, on the realistic side of things. Bathroom play I'm against, as well as any cutting or blood. Generally I like the idea of being a bit more of a soft/gentle dominant, carrot rather than the stick. But if my partner is into the stick, I'm more than happy to oblige. Restraints, teasing, pain play, toys, orgasm control/denial, pet play, collaring, etc. You name it, I'm probably into trying it. I'd love to try playing with hypnosis, real or not. The idea is very fun. I also like to play smut games to satisfy the more unrealistic/fantasy kinks. Being able to talk to someone about those and play them together, etc, would be fun. I'm also a little bit of a switch, but only a little. If we were to quantify it, I'd say 80/20 or 90/10 dom-to-sub. I like to control, but being able to give up that control sometimes is pretty nice too.

Also a little bi. Still consider myself generally hetero but I'm into just about anyone that's more on the femme side of life. I debated making the flair [M4F/T/NB] but figured I was already getting pretty detailed in this post (and angering the bot). But I'm into femboys/femmes/transfems (whatever you prefer). Anyone on the more femme side. To me, so long as I think they're cute/attractive, I don't really care what they've got going on down below. I just want us to both be mutually attracted to each other physically as well as emotionally, intellectually, sexually, etc.

And now what about you? Preferably you're someone willing to talk at first, get to know each other. If you're more experienced as a sub, be willing to 1. Be patient and 2. Teach and tell me what you enjoy. If you're more inexperienced then I guess we'll just have to learn together! I'd prefer someone 22-40, I could go older, probably not going any younger. My best friend told me one day, "You've got divorced 30 year old all over you." (As in I'm the perfect bait for 30 something divorcees, if you know any.) You'd potentially want a relationship out of this; not just something purely for fun. Ideally, we'd enjoy each other as people, and want to actually be together outside of being strapped to sex toys or each other.

Outside of sex, preferably you'd be able to support yourself. I'm finally independent; and while I'm able to support myself, I'm still living a bit check-to-check. Yea, we could talk about a stay-at-home sub situation as we get serious and I further my career. But as of now I'd want someone who could pay their own bills and not be financially dependent on me. As for location, if you're in Louisiana/nearby, if we talk and you're interested we could end up meeting if we're comfortable. If you aren't local, I hope you would be willing/able to relocate eventually if things progress. If you're coming in from just online searching, like I said above, I can't do online/LDR. But if you want to chat about kink, or sex games, or even discuss an 18 DnD/TTRPG game, feel free to message and we can shoot the shit.

I guess I've rambled enough, should wrap this post up. In general, I'm looking for a partner. One willing to live the life but also willing to get to know me and be interested beyond the leather and latex.

Well, y'all have a good day, feel free to message me for questions or comments.