About me- I'm a happily married dyke with some... complicated fantasies that involve men. Today I'm specifically searching for a subby trans boy to hand over some level of control to me.

I recently controlled a genderfluid man through october and part of our dynamic was me respectfully feminizing her on the weekends. During the week he was a man and of little interest to me- though still required to follow our agreed upon rules and on the weekends she was my sweet girl who deserved all my guidance and care.

I've always had a fascination with gender fuckery and... sexuality fuckery tbh. I find kink a really fun and interesting place to play around with those concepts and I can't put down the idea of playing with a trans guy in a similar fashion.

I'm open to negotiation (obviously) but some of the ideas that have floated through my head about this are:

• You're into more humiliation/degradation and are open to some feminization but only in a gender affirming manner. I order you to dress up as a girl or wear panties/skirts and then jerk off for me while I make comments about how I can't believe anyone ever believed you were a girl, you're so *bad* at it.
• Into humiliation but not into feminization? That's fine, but I am a dyke. You can be the dumb boy who has given control of yourself to me. Hurting yourself because it brings me pleasure, giving away your chance to cum without my permission.
• Into front hole pain play? Let's punish it for being useless and work on teaching you to cum from 'proper' stimulation.
• Maybe sexuality doesn't come into it at all because you want to be my puppy. I can't be mad at a puppy for being unable to control itself, now can I?

I want to be a little mean to you. I want to be nice to you too. If you need someone who is Only Mean To You and never correctly genders you- I'm not the queer for you. Again, a lot of this would come up in negotiations, but I want to stress that I will respect your limits/wishes re: what parts are called and what holes are up for play/what things you're willing to do. While I've never considered myself a trans man, I am intersex and bound/passed as male through parts of college as part of my own gender expression. I consider my gender 'butch' these days- though I have jokingly put down 'wife' as my gender more than once.

A few things you need to understand:

• I am happily married. There is no universe where this escalates between us into something further. I'd like for us to negotiate a timeline for our play- a month, maybe three- and if we both enjoy ourselves the entire time, perhaps we can go longer but it will never become 'more' than a kink dynamic.
• I am busy. This goes with the above, and to be honest, is more the reason why it couldn't go further, my wife and I are poly and she's fine with me doing this. There's just... limited hours in a day. I work long hours Mon-Friday and while I often have down time where I might send a message or two it's not perfectly predictable. I'm open to chatting more on the weekends but know that I can't do super long sessions/conversations during the week.
• My timezone is EST- and I'm most available during the week between 5am-7am and 6:30pm-8:30pm. If these times work for you, fantastic. I found asynchronous play worked wonderfully for me and my last play partner (aka, you ask if you're allowed to play with yourself later while I'm asleep, I respond when I wake up.) but I know that might not be as satisfying for some. During the weekend my availability is much more open.
• I don't do pictures/videos of myself. In the future if you're a very good boy, I might be open to some very specific zoomed in shots, but I'm simply not interested in sharing photos of myself usually. If my appearance matters- you can know that I'm a Bigger Butch. I keep my hair relatively short and I enjoy being soft around the edges. My tits are large and I've been told I have a nicely shaped ass.
• Being willing to send some level of photos is a bonus, but not required. These don't need to be face pics- they don't even necessarily need to be body pics.
• I'm open to different titles, but we need to talk like people first. If you really feel compelled to use a title in the first message, Miss is fine. Once we get to know each other a little better and agree to play together then you may call me something other than that.

A non-exhaustive list of kinks I might be interested in playing with in our dynamic but there's no specific ones that are required: pain play, jerk off rules, day-to-day rules, humiliation/degradation, anal play, orgasm control/denial, pet play, watersports, cucking

I'm more than open to the possibility of other kinks being incorporated into our play.

I recognize that what I'm looking for is both incredibly niche and involves a lot of vulnerability. Last time I wrote a personal I was flooded with probably 100 plus messages and wasn't able to respond to each person individually. If I'm right about how many guys might be interested in this, I will do my best to respond even if it's to say I'm not interested/I've found someone.

To prove to me that you've read this and know what you're responding to- in your first message I'd like for you to include 3 facts about yourself (kinky or non kinky, take your pick!). If one of the scenarios I presented really struck a cord with you, I'd also love to know that- or if you have a dynamic that you think would tickle my gender/sexuality fuckery little heart.