About me

The Basics: 39F. 5'5", 155lbs (34-28-40). Bi/Pan. Non-traditionally attractive - genetics have blessed me in that I do not need make-up to look good, so most of the time I go without. Dark brown hair and brown eyes, some freckles that come out if I spend too much time in the sun. Tattooed (hidden, not overwhelming). DDF. Agnostic. Mom to a 16 year old, never married. Master's degree, working full time corporate job at a FAANG company in a non-tech role. Nearly life-long Washington resident, less a stint as a child for a few years in California. I have two cats but love animals in general.

Interests: hiking/backpacking, health and fitness/bodybuilding, music, cars, road trips. Prefer to be 'doing something' versus sitting around, but I don't mind binge watching a good show or playing a video game for hours. Love to laugh ('bad dad jokes' are a sure fire way to get me to laugh like a dork). I enjoy cooking and baking, but am out of practice. I love learning about science, nature, and history - frequently finding myself getting pulled into existential crises from watching earth/space documentaries. Recently picked up listening to audiobooks (hate to admit it, but I am fully enjoying the Romantasy and Dark Romance genres).

Baggage: [in the interest of full disclosure, I feel it's only fair to include this section, and I expect the same from you - I am happy to discuss these in further detail] Managing MDD with medication and therapy. History of SA trauma that I've spent years working through, but am at a point where I know I won't fully heal if I don't allow myself the opportunity to open up to someone. My friends and family would tell you I'm independent, honest, and stubborn to a fault. A bit neurospicy. I have dietary restrictions due to an autoimmune disorder - it's a pain in the ass, but I can usually find something on most menus to eat. I experience imposter syndrome and occasionally feel unworthy. I am working hard to clear out my debts, mostly student loans, within the next two years so as not to burden my potential partner. I've never tried the dating scene, so I'm probably a bit awkward (I've met my exes naturally through work or social groups).

Why I'm here/What I Want: I have put my happiness on hold for far too long. My last relationship was more of a situationship, an on-again-off-again toxic mess that I lost myself in. I ended it after realizing there were too many irreconcilable differences and behaviors that were not changing. Until now, I had chosen celibacy to allow myself time to heal. I do not want to be a side piece or a one night stand - I do not have the time, energy, or patience for that. I want a LTR/life partner (open to marriage, eventually). I want someone I can rely on, my ride-or-die… someone who will listen to me, non-judgmentally, but call me out when I'm wrong. I want to grow with someone and experience the world with them. I want to offer myself and be accepted for who I am, and what I am capable of. I am content by myself, but I know there can be more. I have spent most of my life taking care of myself and other people, but never had anyone take care of me unconditionally. It is a foreign concept that I crave.

D/s Experience: I have had two Doms in the past, both great but the relationships fizzled out. The first was 12 years ago, lasting about six months - our schedules with our kids and work it difficult to maintain. The second was ten years ago, lasted about eight months, and fizzled due to the distance.

Kinks: restraints, sensory play, pain (I love a good flogger), edging, public teasing, private humiliation and discipline.

Boundaries: off the top of my head… waterplay/scat, blood, DD/LG, pet play, poly-play.

There may be more that is off-limits or that I'm open to - just ask. This probably goes without saying, but aftercare is a requirement.

About You:

Soft Dom (comfortable being a little rough if deemed necessary), 38-44 years old, single/divorced, DDF, healthy and active (minimum requirement is to be HWP, prefer a more active/toned build), with at least some post-high school education. Would prefer if you're taller than me by at least a couple inches, but it's not a deal breaker. You may or may not have children, but do not want any new kids together; must be OK with me having a kid and unable to move from the area within the next two years. Must like cats, prefer if You are also an animal person. You are stable, financially and mentally (mental health management OK, obv). You know what You want out of life, for Yourself/Your partner/Your family. You are looking for someone who enjoys the simple things, who doesn't need to live luxuriously to be fulfilled. Similar interests, though we do not need to be aligned on everything. Liberal leaning (I am somewhere in the middle). You feel deeply, love passionately, and give selflessly - and expect the same from me. You are loyal and protective, but not domineering. You aim to grow together, while leading in your role as my Dom/Domme. You see Your role as an opportunity to provide for your sub and partner in a way they would not consider asking for. This is not about control to You, but You do enjoy that element. You want an equal to share experiences with, both in private and in public. You want someone to give their whole self to You, caring for You without question. You value Your partner and Your family's safety and wellbeing above all else. If You see an opportunity that is beneficial to Your sub, You take the initiative to instruct them to take action, and You also do not mind occasionally providing instructions just to assert Yourself ("One scoop of creamed potatoes. A slice of butter. Four peas...").  You are confident and comfortable in your partner's independence, but provide unwavering protection nonetheless. You are proud of Your partner and do not intend to hide them. You are patient and understand what SA can do to a person. Your interest in this relationship isn't purely about sex… but it is a bonus.

D/s Experience: would prefer if You have a few years of experience, but understand that for some people, the opportunity may not have come up to express this side of themselves.

Is this You? What are You looking for? Happy to trade pictures after discussion and trust is earned.