Good evening, kind stranger.

It's such a pleasure to meet you tonight. I'm a young, 24-year-old scholar who is classically educated in literature, art, and poetry. Born abroad by the tree-lined boulevards of a quiet European city, I had a beautiful (if sheltered) childhood surrounded by books and music — where my aptitude for language led me to pursue an education at some of the oldest universities in both America and the UK. I'm well-read, well-spoken, and incredibly cute and winsome (and I'm tall!). And all of this I offer to you, kind stranger. Because I seek to be your cute trophy-boyfriend, to be the handsome partner by your side.

Oh, how I blush at the thought of my words before you! To know that my feelings are spread so starkly upon your screen! But if you'll pardon my audacity, I simply know that my this is the role I'm destined to fill. I've dabbled in commerce. Penned papers in academia. I've travelled the world, and combed through antique libraries. All of which felt like a mirage, mere preparation — simply training, to become the perfect pet for you.

After all, you've accomplished so much. You deserve the very best that is out there. You'll want a partner who's not just someone you bring home, or just a good date for the weekends. You want a status symbol to flaunt before those around you. A partner that will make your friends blush, and your enemies jealous. As your trophy-boyfriend, I'll be the charm of your dinner parties — your adoring partner in all your endeavours, whether they take place at the opera house, the gala, or the hiking trail outdoors.

But of course, dear stranger — naturally, for a woman of your calibre, you seek only the most qualified of candidates for the role of trophy-boyfriend. I know that this is a competitive position. But I'm confident in my capabilities, to meet your most discerning needs. So! Here are some points upon my résumé for you to consider.

To begin, I am resplendently well-read and educated. Being bright (and just a bit precocious), I had graduated at the age of 22 with two degrees, in both the humanities and the sciences. As your trophy-boyfriend, it would be my role to play the host at your saloons, teas, and dinners. And whether it be quoting a snippet of Molière, or learn'd discussions on analytic geometry — I can delight your guests and your companions — never to outshine you, of course!

Naturally, A trophy-boyfriend wouldn't be useful if he couldn't keep the house tidy while you're out. As your partner, I would be your lieutenant, your household secretary, and your personal chef in one! While you are out there, tackling the tough and challenging affairs of the world, I would keep your home neat, your laundry spotless. To be your helpmeet for the hearth and kitchen. And I'll always make sure that you arrive to a home-cooked meal each evening. You would never have to worry about cooking or the dishes. But you'll wake up to a clean room and your clothes ironed and folded. And the scent of freshly baked bread on the weekends too!

I love cooking and baking, but don't let my quaint little affections for domesticity fool you. I know that in order to be your status-symbol, you'll want more than a mere housemaid. I speak four languages. Three of them European, and one Asian. If you love to travel, then I'll be your perfect guide! Having grown up in Europe myself, I could plan our vacations. Whether it is to see the Elgin Marble at the British Museum, or booking last minute tickets to the Metropolitan Opera in Manhattan — I would delight in being your travel companion. To show you the world that I love.

But of course... I have a sense that you'll want more from me than mere charm and poetry. As your trophy boyfriend, you'd want me to be in good shape, so that I can serve you in your desires too. Of course, being entirely yours — how could I possibly refuse? My sense of modesty makes it hard for me to write about such matters without blushing (for I am quite sheltered...), but rest assured that when it comes to the bedroom I'll be flirtatious, submissive, and so eager to please. Above all else, I want you to be proud of your conquest. I want to be hot, sexy, and handsome for you — because serving you is my sole purpose in life. I want you to be able to enjoy me, knowing every part of me belongs to you. That my talent, my intellect, and my body are all here to serve you. As a proper trophy-boyfriend should!

I hope you enjoyed reading my post, kind stranger. I'm a cute, classically-educated scholar seeking to be the trophy boyfriend of your dreams. If what I wrote caught your eye, please get in touch with me. I would love nothing more than to receive a message from you, where you tell me a bit about yourself!

I am easily charmed, gracious, and I promise — even if we're not a match, I will thank you for your warmth with courtesy. I am looking for someone who is older than me, successful, those life would really brighten with the addition of such a charming bauble as myself!

What are you waiting for, kind stranger? Why don't you come write me a message? Why don't you tell me why I'm uniquely suited for you?