Life seldom seems to move in the direction we expect.

I'll be moving to the north side of Kansas City before Thanksgiving, and only know one person in the metro I'm moving to. I'll be massively downsizing and, in many ways, starting over. I've been in rural Missouri for roughly 8 years (about 6 years longer than I anticipated), and am hopeful the move will present more social / relationship opportunities, access to better healthcare options, and hopefully some regular work opportunities where I can apply at least one or two of my four degrees.

I’ve been starved of a number of things while out in the country. So many things have been scarce here; Intelligent conversation, hugs, an active and diverse BDSM singles scene, restaurants and things to do after 8PM, a really good deepthroat blowjob / facefuck, a dating pool where singles and non-morbidly obese folks are common, political views founded on an understanding of policy implementation (rather than Fox News pundits), anyone willing to try anal, regular gatherings of interest / hobby groups… all difficult to encounter. I’ve really wanted to explore my more dominant and sadistic side with an attractive intelligent female, but my trust issues and limited energy prevent me from doing much if I don’t see any friendship or long-term relationship potential pretty early on. I’ve noticed I tend to favor more voluptuous brunettes, but have dated and had multi-year relationships with gals of all types and sizes. The majority of my relationships, I’ve been the kinky one showing folks who expressed interest aspects of lifestyle stuff I like or have explored. I’m trying to be more healthy and tend to steer away from gals significantly heavier than my 6ft. 210lb. self unless they have an hourglass shape and / or are healthy for their body type. Regular tobacco, heavy alcohol, or hard drug abuse are also hard limits. If I invest time and energy in a person, I don’t want them keeling over on me :)

Being a feminist and LGBTQIA ally IRL, the apparent conflict of my objectification and consensual non-consent kinks was typically lost on the majority of folks I even broached the topic with… mostly because the term “feminist” still carries a substantial stigma in much of conservative rural America (and sexual dysfunction / discomfort at even discussing vanilla sexual notions is taboo). It's been extremely difficult to find others interested in pursuing a healthy and respectful vanilla relationship that attempts to integrate the sexual depravity and hedonism of my sadistic and dominant whims in a functioning balance.

Maybe the balance is unobtainable? Maybe I just need to find some younger eager free-use cock-worshipping cumdump who can carry a conversation when her throat isn’t being repeatedly violated by my throbbing dick, or find a partner more my age with responsibilities that limit them to being my urinal and cock sleeve on weekends with the occasional weeknight full swap party. Maybe there just aren’t many functional adults out there who want to be objectified, used, and given a mix of pain and pleasure. Maybe my standards are too high, with a lack of humor, overwhelming negativity, lack of kindness / empathy for others, and being incapable of interesting introspective conversation being four of the fastest ways to lose my interest.

Discussing limits and kinks is foreplay for me, and being honest and up front about STI status along with reasonable efforts to stay healthy are a huge sign of maturity and responsibility to me. (I’ve never tested positive for hepatitis or any STI, but likely carry Mono and HPV like most Americans.)

I would welcome the attention of a gal I can use degrading and objectifying language with. I’d like to have someone willing to commit to following both regular sexual tasks (i.e. fellating me upon arriving home, begging for cock on the floor with your ass plugged and in the air, offering regular acts of sexual service, being my slutty / bimbo arm candy that can carry a better conversation than anyone in the room, etc.) and the assigned tasks throughout the week (i.e. send a pic from work with the butt plug inserted, grabbing something from a store with my cum smeared on your face, writing “whore” on your face before sex for a week, etc.). Someone who welcomes me trying to find creative ways to bring pleasure to them (i.e. getting that guy you thought was cute to fuck your ass for an hour straight, planning a CNC abduction or public scene, learning how you like your cunnilingus, learning every one of your erogenous zones inside and out, etc.) and who will strive to find creative ways to bring me pleasure (i.e. riding my face while your cute friend grinds on my cock, both vanilla and kinky acts of love and devotion, a willingness to suffer through some sex acts knowing that your willingness to be uncomfortable for my sexual gratification is a huge turn-on, etc.). Someone who celebrates and encourages sexual exploration and delights in sharing the experience with me as well as how they feel and process their own experiences.

And when not exploring kinky stuff, being able to be in each other’s space and find comfort and acceptance while living life, navigating a work / life balance, and making plans together for how we may better live (off grid homestead commune? Digital nomads around the world?) Having strong conversation skills and the ability to express feelings (both positive and negative) and talking through both challenging and frivolous concepts with wit and empathy are foundational for me.

I’m an optimist who regularly encounters reality, thus a cynic. I hope humanity makes it to Star Trek post-scarcity, but suspect will instead kill itself off in the next two generations. My absurd, satirical, and sometimes dumb sense of humor was influenced by repeated exposure to Monty Python. Two of my degrees are in media / design, and I am fascinated by narrative media and would love to find others who share my interest to collaborate with (short film, indie games, a kinky porno, etc.). I’m an empathetic and caring person who’s worked in caring professions (mentoring, education, and childcare) for the better part of a decade. I like teaching others, especially about media literacy / 21st century skills and sex-positive consent-based education. A lot of things I felt I once enjoyed I now feel I mostly do to dissociate, and am trying to figure out how to have fun again. I have plenty of flaws, but am aware of many of them and trying to address those I can. I have demisexual and sapiosexual leanings, but don’t fully identify with either term. In ideal happy funtime land, a cute gal would pop up that wants all these things / shares overlapping interests and has the emotional maturity, communication skills, and hedonistic bent to attend to my high sex drive and kinky whims…. and lives in or near where I’m moving (or has the time and means to be present in person). In reality, even someone to sext pervy ideas at or send little sexual tasks and receiving pics or vids of compliance would be welcomed. Tend to lose interest in online only pretty quickly since I'm a VERY physically affectionate person (must get / recieve all the cuddles ._.). Pleasantly above average cock size, but no massive baby arm nonsense.

If interested, tell me how you best think you could be sexually used.

Some of my bigger kinks for a point of reference; I like biting (hard), especially tits, neck, and shoulders. I like calling my partner objectifying terms like “slut,” “whore,” “cum dump.” One of the easiest was to get me to cum / fuck harder is begging “Please use your hole, Master.” Two of my favorite positions are doggy and flatiron (for both vaginal and anal), since I can go deeper, grope tits, and bite shoulders. The idea of orgasm denial and oral / anal only is an idea I’ve wanted to explore for some time. One of the reasons having a partner write objectifying things on themselves (“rape me,” “cock here,” “bite harder,” “fuck hole,” etc.) is appealing is due to my trust issues and wanting reassurance that my sadistic side is wanted. I prefer barehanded spanking over a flogger. I really really like a good blowjob, but have found a good bj to be an exceptionally rare thing, and very difficult to get me off with. Moaning, begging, and whimpering can get me hard.

If you're under 30, it will take some doing to convince me to view you as capable of being more than a convenient cock sleeve / possessing the emotional maturity and life experience necessary for a more meaningful relationship. Open to either dynamic though. Mostly been steering towards women in their 30s who relatively have their lives together and would like to raise a kid. If 40s or 50s, really expecting a sold grasp of self, strong communication skills, and a desire to keep up with my high sex drive.

If you read this whole thing, thanks for taking the time and good luck finding what you’re looking for ;)