In case someone has seen my posts before or looked through my profile, yes, this is the same post and still work in progress with some updates every time.

Some disclaimer. We will not match if any of these are crucial for you: -Any sort of worship, begging or pathos. I'm a calm and happy person. For some neurodivergent reasons I do not reach the emotional highs to do this things genuinely though. In the past I've tried to imitate them but that felt kinda silly. On the upside you don't have to show off or be perfect or stay in any role.

-sexting. I know this might exclude a lot of people, but I don't really care about imagining what we would do with eachothers bodies. I'm happy and complete with writing and autosexuality. We can plan and discuss and perform kinky stuff of course, just not flirt I guess.

-working through a kink list. I am not attracted to any specific kink, but the exploration with a friendly human. I neither have a bucket list. To me, finding interesting things to do is usually slightly more fun than doing them. I'm happy to suggest some ideas, I'm pretty agnostic about doing them though.

Also: I'm a switch but mostly (including now) wanting to be a sub. I'm happy to throw out hierarchies and just be two switches too.

I'm very happy to chat with people who aren't feeling 100% secure about their dominant side (or themselves) too. If your friendly and playful that's all I need basically. The rest is bonus.

I love long 1 to 1 conversations.

I've been reflecting a lot lately about my sexuality and turns out I might be asexual. I believe that to be a silly category but then again I severely struggle to find sense in any traditional categories. I understand them conceptionally, I know why it is joyful for people to eat fancy food, I don't feel it though. Same with sex.

So why am I here??

Simple (unless you want to dig deeper with me). At times I'm longing for this emotional high. I don't know what that is like or what could possibly give it to me. But I want to try out some creative approaches, breach some more borders before I eventually give up that search and go on with my still very happy life.

And I'm still very much attracted to some form of dominance and guidance.

Does this mean I want to go crazy kinky?

Yes. And not at all! I want to leave my comfort zone and learn about what that might do to my sexuality and I need help for that. But I am not going to do any silly- extreme versions of kinks that I find boring in the first place. Hitting harder, tying tighter or going faster is staying within the same categories and thus achieving nothing. I need someone to be creative with, please.

That does not mean you need to be a bdsm expert. Actually, staying away from the formalities of the community would be great.

Who exactly are you? I don't care. As long as I can have serious reflective conversations with you as well as playful fun, I'm going to like you anyway.

What about how you look? Your mind is all I need for now tbh. If this turns long term I'd like to know what you look like when you smile because that's nice to connect with, but for now no pictures required.

In fact if you want to be someone else body or age wise, etc. just leave a little note in your first message that your introducing yourself as a fantasy and that's fine too. Lying about that is awkward though and makes me disengaged.

What about my looks? I'm a regular German dude, nothing fancy, nothing special. I like myself. If you enjoy receiving pictures, please help me learn to take good pictures, cause my camera skills are pretty mid.

If you haven't left for the distinct lack of sexual energy in here, I'm happy to have a chat! I promise I'll try to leave my nerd space and follow your flow.

Feel free to write a simple or long first message, either way is fine.