Hot take: orgasms are ruining sex. Orgasm being the ultimate goal of sex is a result of the pornification of sex, patriarchal culture, and is neither the only nor the best way of having a sexual relationship. The culture surrounding sex that I've experienced has been completely focused on orgasm, and I've found it rather unfulfilling on a deeper, spiritual level.

After being recommended this book by a friend, I've been getting my mind blown by reading “Cupid’s Poisoned Arrow” (https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/6587364-cupid-s-poisoned-arrow). I really appreciated learning about the dopamine cycles associated with orgasm, which mirror other major dopaminergic events like addictions and drug use, and can lead to depression and anxiety. This confirms some feelings that I've been dealing with over the past year or so, and helped me to understand why I crave something so much more intimate than cheap, orgasmic sex can offer.

Reading this book got me thinking. Some of the most soul-gratifying sex I’ve ever had has been that slow, connective kind where it feels like you’re melting into your partner and time ceases to exist. Maybe that's part of the key to a long, healthy, intimate, spiritual connection, and maybe I should try to find someone who is willing to explore this world with me.

About me: I’m 6 feet tall, in decent shape, 420 friendly, not a drinker, a lover of yoga, plant based food, strive to be non-toxic, in touch with my feelings/emotions. I'm looking for a female partner who is interested in exploring non-orgasmic sex, re-centering sex around connection and intimacy, breaking the dopamine cycle, all while hanging out with a pretty cool dude, and most likely eating some delicious meals in the meantime. We can book-club "Cupid's Poisoned Arrow" if you're interested. I'm also interested in discussing and exploring sex magick/sacred sex if we get that far, but that seems like a more advanced practice.

If this post piques your interest, please send me a chat with a little bit about yourself, what resonated with you about this post, what you're looking for, etc. Thanks!