I am a BDSM lifestyler, active since 2005, although retrospectively I think that it was my kinky nature that caused an earlier marriage to fail.

So being controlling to the point of being a control freak was always part of me. I also found during my explorations that I am a sexual sadist. Hurting and humiliating women turns me on and makes me happy.

So yeah, there’s definitely those sides to me. Sides I don’t completely embrace, or rather I try to control them. For there has to be balance in all things in life and as a control freak and a dominant, self-control is of critical importance. You can’t control others if you can’t control yourself.

So I found that a male-led relationship works best for me and creates an incredible density and depth for us. And it works. I’ve had an 11 year D/s relationship and a 5 year M/s relationship, both live-in, also some shorter one and yes, there was some overlap. So I’ve been to my mind to the top of the kink world, one Dom/Master owning and living with two women. As many in the lifestyle can tell you, that plus such long power exchanges are extraordinary.

Thus I think I can say, I have nothing left to prove, I am no longer chasing thrills or items on a kink list (well, there’s this one thing lol) and I am very stable and self-assured in my kinks and my lifestyle.

Now what I am looking for is a woman who feels she needs a controlling and sadistic influence in her life. There are such out there and I know they are because I have had long power exchanges with some.

The ideal candidate hates making decisions, feels she wants a man to look up to, is enamoured with the idea of having her sexuality not her own to control, to have it “owned”, perhaps even wants to feel “owned” herself as a whole, to be someone else’s property. She finds that romantic, in a degrading yet fulfilling way.

Her social status does not matter. I can work with a business owner CEO type of woman as well as a checkout girl or a sex worker. I seek to bring out the best she can be, to maximise her potential.

I will see her as a tabula rasa, a blank slate, for me to change as I see fit. In our politically correct modern times, many will be abhorred by that, but that’s fine, not my match. But some will positively adore a man who takes his woman and shapes her mentally and physically to be his perfect partner. This is what I aim for and I know it will take a lot and lot of time and attention and an immense force of will to make it happen and I possess those things.

Like I wrote at the beginning, capture the mind and the body will follow. That has been my experience in my life.

I find that many women are embarrassed about being needy. No need for that with me. I love and adore being needed. Being needed to the point of her being in discomfort almost pain when she is not able or allowed to be around or near me. The type of intensity of feeling I aim for is somewhat similar to what a dog feels in regards to its Master. Intense need and loyalty. I would most definitely encourage that, and value that.

I live in the UK, plus I have European and American connections, so I can work with anyone from those places and real-life living together absolutely must be the mid- and long-term goal.

There’s still much more to be said and to write, but I will close it here for now. If that already strongly resonates with you, get in touch here. Otherwise I will write more in a weeks time or so.

I am a patient man and if it will take me many weeks of me posting more and more about who I am, what I am looking for, my experiences and other things, then so be it.

I only need to find that one woman after all. I also of course have a boat ton of images which at some point I will curate and create a collection from to support my claims. Whatever it takes.

But if this first post already resonates with you and gives you a tingle, do get in touch and let’s chat.

PS: Man kann mir auch auf Deutsch schreiben.