Howdy.
Preface: No longer looking for online/long distance. I thought I could try and push through, but I myself am not capable of it. I don't mind chatting kink with folks but I can't do an LDR or online S/M. Also, not looking for anyone poly, nor DDlg. Nothing wrong with either, just not for me. I don't want to be a third or a side-thing for someone in a polycule, and the furthest I'll go is letting my partner call me 'Daddy'.
Anyway.
I've been interested in BDSM and the lifestyle for a couple years now and I've been wanting more of it for a long time only recently has my life stabilized mostly that I can really think about things more long term. I've graduated college, moved out and bought my own house, got a full time job, etc.Though what's rough is I spent a lot of my time chugging through school and being a bit awkward just not doing a good job in the relationship aspect of life. So while not only inexperienced in the BDSM field I'm just inexperienced. But I've been hanging around, lurking in the community, fantasizing, etc, and I still feel like it's something I'd want to try and involve in my life. A big fear of mine, relationship wise, is if I end up finding a partner that just isn't interested or worse finds it disgusting, and while the topic is never brought up again, that whole aspect of life is totally cut off from me. I want to at least be able to taste it and see if it's something I would like to keep long term. So about me, I guess. I'm a guy, 28, from Louisiana. I graduated in CompSci and have a full time job in tech. Own my own vehicle and home, currently living with my dog, a cat as well now, solo living now. I'm a little on the heavier side, 5'10" and 215ish(currently on a cut diet), heavily bearded and quite hairy all around. Minus my head, totally shaved for now. If you imagine a stereotypical "bear" in the community, pretty similar. I'd give pics if you want, of course. I'm big on video games and stuff, very nerdy and enjoy watching YouTube and movies, playing DnD or TTRPGs(maybe a kinky DnD campaign could be on the horizon?). I've also got other hobbies, but I'll save that for other times, not exactly a dating forum(not opposed though). My new personality is the gym, basically. I've been slamming it since March 2023 after I got COVID in December 2022. I got a personal trainer, go to the gym 6 days out of the week and Saturdays as a rest day. My current trainer is a killer and works me to death but it's great. I jokingly say I want to get big "choke me Daddy" arms so if you're looking to be a pet gym-rat, let me know.
Sex wise, as I said, not much experience. We'll keep it at that. Kink wise I have a lot of interests, there's not much I'm against outright, on the realistic side of things. Bathroom play I'm against, as well as any cutting or blood. Generally I like the idea of being a bit more of a soft/gentle dominant, carrot rather than the stick. But if my partner is into the stick, I'm more than happy to oblige. Restraints, teasing, pain play, toys, orgasm control/denial, pet play, collaring, you name it, I'm probably into. I also like to play smut games to satisfy the more unrealistic/fantasy kinks, so being able to talk to someone about those and play them together, etc, would be fun. I'm also a little bit of a switch. If we were to quantify it, I'd say 80/20 or 90/10 dom-to-sub. I like to control but being able to give up that control sometimes is pretty nice too. Also a little bi. Still consider myself generally hetero but I mean I've seen some really attractive twinks/femmes.
So what about you? Preferably you're someone willing to talk at first, get to know each other. If you're more experienced as a sub, be willing to be 1. Patient and 2. to teach and tell me what you enjoy. If you're more inexperienced then I guess we'll just have to learn together! I'd prefer someone 22-40, I could go older, probably not going any younger. You'd want a relationship out of this probably. Not just something purely for fun. Like we'd have to like each other as people and want to actually be together outside of being strapped to sex toys.
Outside of sex, (assuming you're nearby or willing to relocate) preferably you'd be able to support yourself. I've recently gotten my own independence and while I'm able to support myself, I'm still living a bit check-to-check. If I made double my current salary, yea, we could talk about a stay-at-home sub situation(eventually), but as of now I'd want someone that could pay for their own bills and not be financially dependent on me. As for location, if you're in Louisiana/nearby, if we talk and you're interested we could end up meeting if we're comfortable. If you're coming in from just online searching, like I said above, I can't do online/LDR. But want to chat about kink, or sex games, or even discuss an 18 DnD/TTRPG game, feel free to message and we can shoot the shit.
I guess I've rambled enough, should wrap this post up. In general, I'm looking for a partner. One willing to live the life but also willing to get to know me and be interested beyond the leather and latex.
Well, y'all have a good day, feel free to message me for questions or comments.
Subreddit
Post Details
- Posted
- 1 month ago
- Reddit URL
- View post on reddit.com
- External URL
- reddit.com/r/BDSMpersona...