First and foremost, I am looking for a long term relationship, and not a casual fling. I am looking to settle down and start (or inherit) a family with the right woman. I am strictly monogamous and do believe in marriage, and looking for someone with similar opinions on that front.

A little about me. I’m a 5’7” software developer who works from home who’s on the fluffy side. I’ve been mostly WFH since 2012, long before it was cool. I’m stably employed and own most of my own home - the bank owns the other 40%. I’m calm and collected under pressure, and am always there for those I care about. I have my geeky side, love board games, books, my pets, and scuba diving. I enjoy plays, musicals, and historical sites. I also have my primitive side - one of my favorite hobbies is blacksmithing. I drink occasionally (1-4 times a month), and don’t do drugs. I’m up to try most anything once, and there are few activities I have tried and not enjoyed.

My love language is traditional romantic gestures and being supportive - always a pillar you can lean on and trust to be there for you when needed. I have been described as sappy by more than one person.

What am I looking for in a partner? Personality wise I’m attracted to someone I can trust, who shows an interest in my life/interest, but also has a life and interests of her own. In any relationship, there are three people: me, you, and us. All three of those “people” need their own lives and to grow. I love to teach and also to learn. I’m looking for someone who either has a child/children who need a good male father figure in their life or who is interested in starting a family with me if things work out. I need someone who can show effort in the relationship and values having their “person” to share their daily ups and downs with. Eventually, I’m looking for someone who is the first person I think about in the morning and the last person I think about before I fall asleep, and someone who feels the same about me.

On the kinky side, I’m a dominant leaning switch, and looking for someone who is either a switch themselves or a submissive who would not mind playing the role of a service top occasionally. I would love someone who is a little bratty. Submission isn't worth as much if it isn't earned (in the day to day sense - it always needs to be earned in the relationship as a whole). I would describe myself as a dominant who wants to do what is best for his s-type. That could be throwing you over my knee and making sitting unpleasant for the next few days - or not. It depends on what turns you on. I am interested in pet play - having my very own kitten/puppy that I can make purr/wag her tail, but it’s not necessary. I can praise as well as chastise as the situation demands. All of the above is optional, but I’m primarily interested in some sort of D/s dynamic both in and out of the bedroom, but not looking for a full TPE. A dynamic where I can help my submissive grow and develop as a person, and help her get to or maintain a healthy fulfillment and contentment in her life.

I am not that experienced in the world of kink, but live by three things: 
- SSC or RACK: consent is king
- Don’t yuck someone’s yum: just because I don’t personally like a specific kink of yours, and you can enjoy it alone, all the more power to you. And I would appreciate someone who feels the same way too.
- Communication: If we can’t build a trust that allows us to be open with each other, that’s a problem. Having secrets is fine, hiding your thoughts, feelings, and emotions erodes trust.

If you’ve read this far, go drink some water.

Or not. It’s up to you. You may be a submissive/switch, but you’re not my submissive/switch… yet. Until then, I have no say.