Hey you! Have you been reading a lot of personal ads? Well maybe, just maybe you've finally stumbled across the right one. They say the best personal ad only has to attract one person, the right person. So here's hoping that you are out there, that you are looking for the same kind of lifelong emotional and physical connection that I am, and that you take a few minutes to read what I've written here. I think you'll like it :-)

The Future

Oh my, writing these things can be so difficult. Where to start... where to start...

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...

No, that's not right. I'm sure you must be a bit closer than that.

It was a dark and stormy night...

No, too cliche, too black and white. There must be a more original way to begin.

Once upon a time...

Ah yes, there it is.

Once upon a time you were browsing reddit looking through ad after ad thinking you might never find the man you are looking for. There's another interesting one. A little unusual, kinda fun, maybe I should give it a try, send a message and see if anything happens. Little do you know™ that your life is about to change forever.

Once upon a time you were lying naked on a bed. Your wrists are tied to the bedposts, your ankles and legs are tied to each other restricting your movement. You feel the tension and strength of the ropes against your skin, you feel the soft satin of the blindfold against your eyes. You hear a man moving around the room. You know his name, but you only call him 'Sir'. As he moves closer to you your anticipation builds and builds. You've edged yourself so many times today, all you can say in this moment is "Please... Sir..." You don't know what he will do to you now, but you know that whatever he does it will set you on fire and after you have burned for him you know you will find yourself in his arms surrounded by a love and affection you used to only dream of.

\record scratch** \freeze frame**

I'll bet you're wondering how you ended up in this situation. Well it's not that complicated. You read my personal ad and decided to message me. You said "How many times can a couple watch The Big Lebowski and The Princess Bride in one lifetime?" and I said "Let's find out!"

Me, Myself, and I

"Okay, sure", you say, "I'm into it. I want a long term, loving, kinky relationship, but who are you? Are we even compatible? Will my dog like you?" Of course, an emphatic Yes! Animals love me, mostly because I smear bacon grease on myself every day. And we might be compatible if you value trust, honesty, humor, and friendship. If you have an adventurous curiosity, and an eagerness to find and experience new things, and a desire to have someone special to share the journey with. If you are excited about taking the time to build a fun and fulfilling dynamic together then at least we are both looking in a similar direction.

I'm a 36 year old American computer programmer. I am financially well off and emotionally just unstable enough to be fun to talk to. I like to get stoned and read fantasy novels, take long aimless walks through new cities, play badminton or ttrpgs with good friends. My favorite things to do on date night are cooking dinner together and watching old movies, or spending all afternoon in the museum. I like regular Oreos better than double stuffed, I know that sounds crazy, but I stand by it. Yeah, I'm a big nerd. I like to talk endlessly about music and movies I make jokes at inappropriate times because I love to see the people I care about smile. I love to travel to see new places and try new foods. I am adventurous in all of the right ways. At the same time I love to spend lazy days at home in comfort. Basically like a hobbit; I love the comforts of food and home, but sometimes I can't resist the sirens call of adventure.

It's hard to say exactly what I'm looking for. I'm not here to find a specific dynamic that I already have set in mind, I'm here, rather, to find a person to build a dynamic with. I don't know exactly what our dynamic together will be like because I don't know you yet. Will you be a slave, a toy, a pet, a brat, a bubbly chatty doll, a demure submissive housewife? I'm looking forward to finding out! Perhaps I can at least convey a certain mood or theme that might help give you a better idea of what's in my mind.

I do know that I want you to be my most prized, most loved possession. Something that I cherish and take care of, something that I am proud to call mine. I want to be the man who earns your submission, who draws out your inner self and gives you the feeling of safety, comfort, and acceptance you've always needed to pour yourself out and give yourself fully to someone.

My Kinks

I may not be able to tell you exactly what I want in a dynamic, but at least I can tell you the particular kinks and limits that are important to me. The most important kinks to me, the things I need most in a kinky sex life are bondage, free use, and orgasm control. Those are the must haves as it were, the main ingredients.

Apart from that I am interested in a wide variety of things, and willing or even excited to try many others that I haven't yet. I like having passionate rough primal sex (choking, pulling hair, slapping , spanking, biting, throwing you around, and so on). I love seeing my partner tied up and helpless beneath me. I enjoy bondage, free use, deep-throating, begging, controlling your orgasms (edging, denial, forcing you to cum), sensory play, body writing, and some discrete public play (hidden toys, making you take off your panties under the table, secret instructions, things like that). I like being in control. I love to play with the psychological aspects of a D/s dynamic; finding out what turns you on, which punishments you enjoy, which ones you hate, and how to use that knowledge to get you deeper under my control. I want to turn you on, to make you want me so much it hurts, and sometimes hurt you so much you want me. I enjoy all the toys, apparatus, and devices, but you'd be amazed at what I can do with nothing more than a blindfold and a leather belt.

I'm not interested in play involving diapers, urine, feces, blood, or anything overly filthy. I'm not into doing anything that will cause permanent injuries or long lasting marks. I'm not interested in any scenes or scenarios that involve sharing my sub with other men in any way.

Boring logistical stuff

Alright, you're interested so what comes next? Well first I'll say it doesn't matter much to me where you are. I am willing and able to travel often and would love to take a trip almost anywhere to meet up if we hit it off. I can also relocate or help you to relocate if we decide to move forward long term. I don't mind if you have school or a career, but I can also support us if we decide to have a dynamic where that is preferable. I don't think I want children, and I definitely don't want other peoples' children so I would prefer that you don't come with any. Because of my love for food and travel I would prefer that you are not vegan or vegetarian.

So if you've read all the way here and you think this might be the kind of thing you are looking for then I'd love to hear from you. Send me a picture of yourself and tell me about your favorite books or movies. Tell me what kind of sub you think you are or want to be and how that would contribute to a healthy dynamic. Or just tell me your name and why you want to talk to me. Don't be shy, I'm not scary (at first) and I won't bite (until we're both ready).

I hope to hear from you soon! Seek and you shall find