I am seeking a real life, in-person (not online or video-only), monogamous LTR (ideally my last) with “my person,” for what can eventually become a cohabitating 27/7(ish? lite?) D/s dynamic (so involving more than just kink). Essentially, I’m looking for my final life partner who also happens to be a Dominant. Please note I am unable to relocate.

About me: Professional career woman, fierce mom (one teen), well-educated, social drinker, demisexual and sapiosexual, empathetic, intuitive, snarky, attentive, kinky, conversational, affectionate, devoted, and witty. I enjoy long deep talks, flirty dinners, and various shenanigans. Chubby (about a size 16/18), long hair, with piercing eyes and attractive (so I’ve been told, but recognize that is subjective) and absolutely not “fit and toned.” Willing to share (PG) pics, obviously. I identify as a submissive, not a slave, and am a solid mid-level masochist.

About potential partner: Straight man, 46-64, who identifies as a Dom or Master (switches are not a good fit for me) and has IRL experience. Ideally, I seek someone who is confident (not arrogant) and dominant (not domineering) in his daily life (a leader at work, etc.), honorable, educated, and emotionally available (able to verbally express emotions and affection). Who someone is as a person is more important than appearance, but I do prefer a clean-cut/professional look.

It’s important to me that my partner have his life together (relatively speaking) because someone needs to have control of their own life before they can control me (that something a wise, former Dom drilled into my head). It’s also important he has space and time in his life for a relationship; my last two meaningful dynamics ended primarily because my partners were too consumed by work. (I will always make my relationship a priority, so simply ask the same of my partner.)

The details: Intrinsically, I crave ownership and connection in a loving relationship that focuses on the day-to-day authority transfer (most of which is non-sexual); this affects my desire to submit. Building this level of closeness takes time, patience, and consistency. The psychological and physical aspects of D/s are as, if not more, important than the physical.

Although certainly conversations will take place about D/s topics, I do not wish to jump into a dynamic; rather, I want to build the emotional and psychological connection prior to moving into power exchange. Please note I will not engage in tasks/assignments until this has occurred. That’s a recipe for disaster for both people, as far as I’m concerned.

Choosing to omit kinks here because that is not what I want to focus on. If someone leads with conversations about this, either by sharing their own kinks right off the bat or asking me sexual questions, then we’re not on the same page. 😉

There are also a couple of posts on my profile, one of which has some important information.

Disclaimers! Please note I’m NOT interested in: Sexting/kinky DMs, phone-based play or online “relationships,” poly/ENM, “Soft Doms” or “Hypno Doms,” FWB/play partners/casual/NSA, couples, Dommes, switches, smokers, folks outside the United States, or anyone sneaking around on an unknowing partner.

If you message, please share a favorite 80’s song. It’s a fun fact about you and I’ll know you read the ad. 😉