Appearance

I'll start with the surface stuff, because you, dear reader, are entitled to your preferences.

• I'm 29.
• I'm 6'3".
• 170 Pounds / 77 kg, very fit.
• Caucasian American.
• Blonde, with a short manbun.
• I've got dimples when I smile (apparently this is a turn-off for some folks, so better include it!)
• I don't tend to wear a beard, but often keep a little scruff.
• I live in central DC.
• I wouldn't classify my face as either the stuff of supermodels or as anything close to ugly - I like the way I look. Happy to swap pictures, both SFW and NSFW, once we connect - again, it would be intellectually dishonest to pretend you shouldn't have preferences that inform your romantic decisions. I know I do.

Hobbies

• Generally I am quite extroverted, so while the below is a comprehensive list, my most frequent activity is just spending deep time with my closest friends; I typically have at least one comprehensive social interaction a day outside of work. I'm not necessarily looking for someone else with the same level of socialness or anything - I bring it up because it is, in a way, a hobby in itself.

• I love to get outside and exercise.

  • I run about 50 miles a week and have been doing various races for the last few years.
  • I go to the gym, mostly for upper body lifting, 5 times a week. I'm not particularly shooting for a bulky look, I just enjoy being strong.
  • I rockclimb, both indoor top-rope and outdoor.
  • I backcountry backpack for a few days a month either alone or with friends.
  • I canoe camp a fair amount, too!
  • I used to do archery, but since moving to DC I've found it's super expensive. Someday hope to have enough of a backyard to pick it back up.

• I read an absolute ton, maybe 1-3 books a week, some on paper, some audiobooks while I run or work out.

  • Mostly I read a lot of sociology, econ, and a smattering of history.
  • I also have a weakness for science fiction, especially hard sci-fi. I'm reading the Children of Time series right now!
  • I also do consume some Proper Literature from time to time, if a bit begrudgingly. One of my friends got me into Chernyshevsky last summer and I've been hooked.
  • I'd love to hear what your favorite fiction and nonfiction books are!

• I'm somewhat artsy.

  • I do carpentry and carve wood. Be careful, I'll make you a whole houseful of furniture if you date me.
  • I used to paint and want to get back into it, but don't have the time. Maybe we can paint together.

• I'm fairly engaged in my community and am a committed progressive.

  • I volunteer with a local charity that teaches ESOL to refugees & assylum seekers.
  • I am active in two mutual aid societies (oddly neither in DC).
  • I am a canvassing organizer for both primary and general elections, usually volunteering in VA districts.

Values

Above all, I value growth. I had a not-so-great-childhood and early 20s, but that has been a blessing of sorts as I learned that I am never done improving myself. Being able to look at a part of yourself that sucks, recognize it, and work to fix it is the best skill anyone can learn. This means the greatest gift I believe anyone can give me is feedback, either positive or negative, to help me further improve myself.

Beyond personal development, I mainly just want to meaningfully improve society. I am very fortunate to be both well-paid and making a positive impact on a problem I care about through my work, but I've started to get the itch to do more. I am determined to matter, and think I can. Quixotic, perhaps. If you are proudly nihilistic or materialistic - more power to you, but we won't get along.

In all things interpersonal, I like to communicate, communicate, communicate. (Could you not tell that from the length of this post?) I don't do well with coy people who don't like to, or can't, speak what's on their mind.

Other Random Stuff

• I enjoy discussing practically anything, or learning about things I don't know. What's a neat passion of yours I might not know much about?
• I consider myself ambi-amorous. (What does that mean? It means I've been happy/healthy in both monogamous and polyamorous relationships in the past. Either works great for me - the important thing is commitment, communication, and knowing where we stand / what we mean to each other.)
• Love languages: Yes, a flawed concept, but still useful. I thrive receiving acts of service and words of affirmation, I am capable of dishing out most things (for years, gift giving was a bit of an achilles heel, but have worked hard on improving). I especially like to give words of affirmation, though! One of my odder habits is that I keep a spreadsheet of all my friends' love languages so I can make sure I'm supporting them well.
• I definitely do want kids at some point in the future, if what you're looking for is a long-term relationship!

Sex (outside of kink)

• I have an enormous love of being fellated.There is nothing, nothing as hot to me as an enthusiastic blowjob.
• ...I am serious. My greatest psychological weakness is that if you can deepthroat me and enjoy it, I will fall in love with you on the spot. I am only partly joking.
• Very much enjoy penetrative sex too, don't worry. There's nothing as hot as pounding someone from behind while whispering dirty praise in their ear.
• I don't cum super easily. I've gotten it checked out, it's not medically problematic or anything. I'm kind of glad, because I think the male orgasm (frankly, the orgasm in general) is over-obsessed about in our culture. I'd rather both of us have lots of fun, for as long as we can, versus getting to cum the one time myself.
  • Pros: I have a ton of stamina and can fuck as long as you like, and will enjoy it.
  • Cons: If you're into playing with jizz, you'll have to work for it.
• Above absolutely everything else, enthusiasm, reciprocity, and open-mindedness is sexy as fuck!

Sex (kink)

• Generally, I think of kink in terms of trust and power, not specific actions or activities. I want someone who submits to me because they know I will do what is best for them, and I want to dominate and control someone most when I deeply understand what they need and feel like I can protect and guide them. So - no big list of kinks for now, even though I'm into tons of stuff. It's all about US, at the end of the day. Let's chat about this more! I'd love to hear what you're into, and won't mind discussing kink and power right out of the gate if that's important to you.
• I will say that I'm technically proficient in safely dealing pain and performing ties - I have both taken a few classes and have 10 years of experience.

What I'm looking for

The top thing I'm looking for is someone who's read the above and liked it. People on here swap kink charts and so forth thinking that with overlap comes compatibility, and that's true to a point, but I want to hear from you mainly if, upon reading this, you heard a voice in your head that went, "fuck yeah". So even if you're not theoretically a perfect match but felt a spark, I'd love to hear from you.

• Ideally in the age range 24-35, roughly. No teens. Seriously, no teens. It's not cool to ignore this.
• Generally have your life together. Feel free to define this flexibly.
• You take care and pride in both your mental and physical health.
• In DC or reasonably close; I'm not as good as I'd like to be at long distance.
• Are a direct, communicative person with time and energy to put into something right now. I like to communicate and be communicated with. I will not respond to one-liners! Reciprocation is sexy, don't you agree?

Mail me!