About me: 38, fat, white, sarcastic and quirky. Incredibly awkward with a filthy mind. More on the filth later.

I'm looking for something actually very very specific. I haven't had luck yet in finding my match. But I'm persistent and I'm going to try again to articulate my needs and wants as best I can. So here we go.

I'm looking to build a D/s dynamic that is online based and not entirely revolved around kink. Although my experience as a submissive has mostly been online,I have a good understanding that we need more than filth to build something that lasts. Lucky for us, I enjoy the idea of having mundane decisions made for me. You want to decide my dinner tonight? Great let me give you some options and you pick what you'd like me to eat. You want to pick out what my outfit is today? Absolutely, let me show you some options! You want to watch me do inappropriate things to myself because it amuses you? Yes please. Let's be filthy together. I enjoy being treated like a playtoy. Feeling used for your enjoyment.

I love routines and tasks and rules. I love showing my obedience. And I cannot get enough of the praise when I've done a good job. Please tell me I'm a good girl.

Now here comes the hard part. I have requirements, I prefer experienced Dom's, ideally 30 , who are witty, creative and have the time for a needy mess of a person such as myself. I like to laugh and I like to be sarcastic. Banter is huge and such a turn on for me.

I figure at this point if you're still reading you may be interested in knowing some of my deviant interests and limits so please see below.

spankings, degradation, object insertions, bondage, bruises, orgasm control, bladder control, watersports, wardrobe control, butt plugs, toys, name calling

Hard limits; no blood no scat no minors no animals. Nothing that could land me in jail.

Some things you should definitely know, I can be sarcastic, I can be blunt and direct. But I can also be shy and awkward and flustered. No kids. No husband.

Okay so as for you, if you've read this and you're thinking yes I like task oriented submissive awkward girls who don't really know what they're doing they're kind of a mess but like also kind of functioning okay and you're thinking maybe I can help this girl, please message me.

Bonus points to you if you can spell full words, understand how to banter, or have a beard.