Looking to create a healthy, non-rushed long-term partnership (including fiery bedroom antics) and eventual family with a loving man aged 30-42ish.
Superficially at the outset - I’m small (not quite 5’2”, sizes 0/00 petite, soft/gently curvy), with long golden blonde hair that I wear naturally wavy, and a conventionally pretty face (I prefer light make-up, if any). My style is feminine but not cutesy (I’ve been wearing a lot of lace and linen dresses this summer, and some of my favorite shops are Reformation, Madewell, Anthropologie, and Dôen, if you need a visual!). In general, I’m low maintenance but do care about looking good.
Starting with some bulleted quick hits, and a somewhat exhaustive (exhausting?) narrative to follow ;).
Musts:

• Deep desire to be a true partner (to know and be known/support and be supported) and create a family one day
• Prioritization of physical/mental health and fitness (I don't have a lot of routines, but I'm physically active and take care of myself mentally)
• Solid support network of friends/family, a community
• Socially/politically aware and engaged (you don’t have to be an activist, but please vote, read news publications, and have opinions) - we can have differing views, but I wouldn’t be a great match for someone socially/politically conservative (I’m a humanist)
• Financial stability
• Some interests and hobbies beyond work!

Preferences:

• Love of the outdoors (including long urban walks, mountain hikes, long bike rides, and camping trips), adventure of all kinds, and travel (domestic and international, active and leisure)
• I’m agnostic and not religious, but don’t care if you are - however, I won’t convert or enforce a particular dogma with regard to my kids (happy for them to be exposed to religion and decide for themselves, and/or to incorporate any cultural heritage elements into the family!)
• I’m not prescriptive about location, but we should be realistic - I’m settled on the East Coast, but am from the Midwest and am strongly considering moving back that way; also would be open to moving further west or elsewhere, under the right circumstances
• Physical attraction: It’s all a spectrum and balanced with mental attraction, but I tend to feel the greatest spark/chemistry with guys who are taller than average, somewhat muscular (not looking for a six-pack or body-builder, but go a bit crazy for a broad chest and well-defined arms, and I do enjoy being picked up and tossed around), and I melt for kind eyes and a great smile - I am veryyy attracted to handsome guys with quiet confidence and humility
• Mental attraction: I tend to find men who are well-read, passionate, self-aware, emotionally adept, and highly competent to be the hottest! Also love a good conversationalist (dirty-talking and otherwise!), and attentive listener

Dealbreakers:

• Being partnered and/or interested in non-monogamy or playing with others in general
• Those searching for an online-only dynamic
• Not liking/wanting to have kids at some point
• Misogyny or bigotry of any kind
• Lack of curiosity (about the world, me)
• Selfishness and/or emotional immaturity

Kinky bits:

• My focus is mostly on intimacy, trust, connection, and tone/how things are framed and delivered more than needing/wanting specific acts or props
• Yes: Roleplay (varied, including light ddlg, light CNC, primal), bondage, sensation play, breeding (though specifically with someone I love and want to have a family with), heavy dirty talk/praise, D/s generally (seeking softer/pleasure dom/daddy, potentially open to occasional switching)
• No: Degradation, humiliation, choking, heavy pain, TPE, lifestyle kink
• Everything else/specifics to be discussed!

If you’re with me so far, here’s the non-abridged version:
I’m looking less for one particular personality type/dynamic and more for a partner to create a kaleidoscope of experiences together. I enjoy challenging myself in new and different ways, exploring polarity, and learning and growing in general. After a decade of adventure and self-prioritization, I’m content with who I am and what I have done, and also feel an innate and growing eagerness for the next phase of my life.
I am most excited to be a wife and mom one day, and to devote myself to my future family. However, it’s important to me to retain an identity, interests/relationships, and independence from my role as caretaker, and to have a partner who not only sees and understands me in all of my complexity, but who also wants and encourages me to be a whole person outside of our relationship and home. I’m naturally giving, nurturing, and love to make the people I care about feel good and cared for - but, I don’t want only to be seen/acknowledged/appreciated for those qualities. I’m sweet and largely amenable/accommodating, but I have convictions and like to challenge/be challenged in a constructive way - I’m not going to make myself smaller or perform obedience (outside of negotiated sexual play!). I’m very loyal, persistently solutions-oriented and always look for compromise and common ground, but I will not alter who I am at my core (nor would I ask anyone else to!). I’d prefer for us to deeply respect and admire and desire each other as we are.
I love where I am, but also have lived elsewhere domestically and abroad and have roots with many people in many places - I grow wherever I’m planted and I want to make a home and a life in the place that makes the most sense for my future immediate family. My relationships mean the most to me (I travel to see my family often, and I maintain close friendships from every phase of my life) and I will prioritize and remain invested in them no matter where I am. My biggest goal is to create a home and life that is warm, welcoming/inclusive, and fun, filled with love and laughter: the house with the best snacks that all the kids can help themselves to, with extra seats at the dinner table and a well-stocked guest room for planned and unexpected visitors; the site of game nights and movie nights and dinner parties and slumber parties. I want to create a home that both looks and feels good - I have an eye for design and (admittedly) expensive taste, but want to prioritize comfort/coziness and spaces for real life, creativity, and play (in my dreams, we’d have a charming old house with a fruit/vegetable/flower garden, a treehouse, and a porch swing). I can’t wait to decorate for birthdays and holidays, celebrate things big and small, create family traditions, and imbue my kids’ childhood with magic and wonder - fostering their curiosity and talents, and helping them to become confident, resilient, intrepid explorers/creators/lifelong learners.
I am invested in, care about, and am successful in my career, but further professional achievement isn’t my primary motivator. I’m amenable to a range of possible divisions of labor with a partner, and will prioritize being physically/emotionally present for my children regardless. I’m open to potentially taking a step back from working or staying home, but am not willing to sacrifice family financial stability or forgo providing my kids with worthwhile opportunities in order to make that happen (happy to discuss this further). I was raised with affluence and opportunity and have a keen awareness of and appreciation for that, as well as a deep sense of obligation to utilize my privilege to contribute positively to society, globally and locally. I’m a service-oriented person, and am really attracted to other service-oriented people, and want to create a partnership where we prioritize thinking about how to keep doing more for each other, our family, our friends/communities, and beyond. I am politically liberal - while I don’t need us to agree exactly on every issue, I do want to align in overall worldview/ideology. I try to lead with empathy, but I can’t be with anyone who thinks I am or anyone else is lesser or intrinsically limited/invalid, or who turns a blind eye to oppressive systems and practices.
I truly want to know and understand my partner, care for and support (and ultimately love) him in the ways that he needs/wants and feels it the most (emotionally, physically, sexually and non-sexually). I want to discover his deepest desires and fulfill them, listen to his insecurities and reassure him, learn his true pain points and take care never to press them. I want to earn his trust, and be a place of love, safety, comfort, and belonging for him. I want to build him up, appreciate him for who he is and not just what he does (but also what he does/all of his efforts!), and make him feel seen, valued, and deeply wanted/needed. I want to inspire in him the desire to love and protect and care for me with the way that I demonstrate love and care and consideration of him. I want to cherish and be cherished.
Sexually, I want to give and ask for and learn and please and be instructed and take, feeling emboldened to be as we are and play as we want, knowing that we are both fully desired and accepted. I am searching for someone who will consider and protect me, even as he takes what he wants (and is encouraged to do so only by knowing that I want it too); someone who is communicative, attentive, perceptive, and doesn’t shy away from tenderness (even if just a hint in rougher moments). I want a partner who affectionately cups my cheek, caresses my arm (and other places), whispers sweet, filthy words in my ear and will alternately coax/push/command me all with loving undertones and encouragement. I don’t want to feel like just a vessel for pleasure; I want to be adored and have my needs prioritized even (especially) when I’m giving up control. I want to see the care in his eyes while he’s undressing me and wanting me and possessing me, and to know that he feels my desire for and to give to him. I want us to (metaphorically) light each other on fire and sooth each other’s burns, whether we’re in an isolated cabin in the woods for the weekend or at home on a Tuesday.
I’m submissive, but I am open to occasionally doing a bit of switching/trying some gentle domming with the right partner (it’s a vague curiosity, but not required or anything I’m experienced with). I think everyone deserves cuddles and care (and aftercare for both partners, always) - and I love/want to/will be a doting partner! But, I don’t want to be the emotional or physical big spoon all the time. I’m not clingy or attention-seeking, but I can and will self-advocate, and I sincerely hope my partner will also communicate if he wants something more or different from me/if desires aren’t being met. I want us to make connecting and fulfilling each other’s emotional, physical, and sexual needs a priority.
I am confident in my agency and autonomy. Regardless of who my partner is and whatever way we define our relationship and any exchange of power/control, I will own my choices and decisions and remain responsible for my health (physical and mental) and happiness. I need to be with someone who understands that I am wanting and choosing this for myself (out of many other open pathways), not that I have an inherent/particular “place” or “role” to fill. I want to find someone who I can fully trust and rely on to take care of me (in and outside of the bedroom) - it feels vulnerable to place a part of my well-being in someone else’s hands, and I need to know that he is considerate and responsible and wanting to protect my heart, will take initiative/be proactive and do things as well as (or better than) I can. I haven’t been able to fully let go mentally, emotionally, and sexually before - but, I want that so much.
I'm not looking for a lot of responses, just the right one, but if any part of what I wrote spoke to you, I would be happy to hear from you! :)