Please bear with me. I am seeking “the One” and I am verbose, so this is long! I am seeking a real life, in-person, monogamous LTR (ideally my last).

Not looking to get anyone off in DMs. NO interest in an online dynamic. Please, if you are not also looking for the same, do not waste either of our time.

I want a relationship with all the trappings (romantic gestures, vacations, lazy Sundays with coffee) paired with authority transfer, kink, and fostered by a deep love between me and my Dominant/Master. Ultimately, I’d like a lifetime cohabiting relationship that focuses on the day-to-day authority transfer (most of which is non-sexual).

Please note: No FWBs, play partners, switches, bedroom-only Dominants, bi/heteroflexible men, newbies or people looking to learn, anyone younger than 42, smokers, or people cheating on an unknowing partner (I am not side chick material, and I have no intention of being a dirty little secret).

Intrinsically, I crave ownership and connection that enables me to feel protected, vulnerable, loved, and nurtured; this affects my desire to submit. Building this level of closeness takes time, patience, and consistency. I do not wish to jump into a dynamic with someone; rather, I want to build the connection prior to moving into power exchange.

I am demisexual and sapiosexual. An empathic (sometimes disabling so), intuitive, well-educated, witty woman who enjoys long talks about topics both silly and serious, and flirting with you over dinner and cocktails. In addition to spending time with my kiddo and dogs, I enjoy autumn and Halloween, filling my Amazon shopping cart, thunderstorms, exchanging memes (I am a certified meme slut), coffee, coffee, coffee, 80s techno pop (don’t judge me), the scientific method, validation, the smell of lilacs, collecting notebooks I’ll never use, car dancing, movies, and unnecessary trips to Target.

In my daily life, I have a great deal of responsibility requiring me to be strong and assertive. This is exhausting and I long to let go with a strong partner who will take the lead. In many ways, I am a strong person seeking someone stronger.

Might that be you?

Confident (not arrogant) and dominant (not domineering) in your daily life (relationships, career, family), perceptive and intelligent, patient, honorable, self-aware, and emotionally available/able to express emotions with ease.

I need someone unwavering, secure; his strength is intrinsic, he is dominant by nature. This is not a role he plays. I am not an “easy” submissive; I need someone who, by the nature of who he is, can compel me to submit. Not out of fear, or threats, or barking commands, but from a place of calm strength. When he looks at me, I feel he can see right through me and I have no choice but to acquiesce. I need to feel that strength. Otherwise, it won’t work for me. I don’t know that I believe in that “alpha submissive” nonsense, but if there is such a thing then I am it.

Are you a man who, like me, desires more than kinky sex and bedroom dynamics, who appreciates the emotional and psychological aspects of power exchange? Do you want to get inside your partner’s mind, learn about and accept all aspects of her, and (gently) push her boundaries?

I have mixed feelings about including kink specifics here as it is of secondary importance to everything else, but here it is, anyway. I’ve got a bit of a masochistic streak (sensation and impact play) and prefer someone skilled in that area. I am massively turned on by certain types of edge play. I love being restrained. A hand around my neck firm enough to leave bruises (although this requires practice and skill, as well) makes me swoon, as does being told I’m a good girl. ;-) Of course, none of this is enjoyable without the psychological link and emotional connection.

It’s been reported I can be a tad bratty, not for the sake of brattiness but because of my sarcastic and playful personality. (A former partner told me one of his favorite things about me was how much of a smart ass I am.) I feel safe when seated at my trusted partner’s feet with my head resting in his lap and his hand on my hair.

It may sound sentimental, but I am waiting for my person to find me. (Or for us to find one another.) Experienced in D/s dynamics, he is a strong, unwavering, and loving caregiver. A man who will enable me to let go and feel secure emotionally, physically, and financially. (Note I am a career professional who earns a good living, but would prefer for my partner to manage the finances; I’m also willing to have a conversation around leaving work, if we were to decide that is best). A man who provides structure and stability, and who helps me grow not just as a submissive, but as a person.

In return for all this, I will offer my best, full effort. Devotion, loyalty, respect and, ultimately, deep love. If I commit to you (and you to me), you will have all of me—body, mind, and soul. I want to be yours and for you to be mine.

At 50 , I am a real woman (with a 50 body) who hovers around a size 16/18. Many have told me I don’t look my age (a spry 51?!) and am attractive (also subjective). Of course, happy to provide photos should we get to that point.

Non-smoker and prefer you are the same (an occasional cigar or whatever is no issue). Social drinker. Because I am a parent, my child will come first and, if you are a parent, I anticipate it will be the same for you. Horribly allergic to cats (but adore dogs). Please have time and space in your life for a relationship—talks, texts, dates, weekends.

If any of this resonates with you, I look forward to your introduction! Should you reach out, please let me know what it is about my profile that interests you. :-) Best of luck out there!