I have been totally blind since birth. While blindness can pose its own challenges, it certainly has not stopped me from travelling, attending university, programming, engaging in sex and kink, or otherwise living my life! I've heard some people say that when someone loses a sense, the others are somehow "enhanced". I'm not sure that I believe that, although I haven't seen before so can't be completely sure; personally, I think that I have the same senses of hearing, taste, smell, and touch as everyone else, but I just need to pay attention to them more as I can't see and therefore am more naturally able to obtain information from them than people who get most of their information through vision.

Chains and whips may excite Rihanna, but they are of no particular interest to me. My style of dominance is mental first: I'm far more interested in figuring out just how to modulate my voice in just the right ways to make my subs react than inflicting huge amounts of physical pain (and then, it's more about eliciting reactions than about pain for the sake of pain). As such, I'm not an "instant gratification" dominant – if that's more your thing, I hear GPT chatbots are all the rage. I'd like to get to know you as a person and "how you tick" before any big D/s happens. Negotiation about things like consent and limits takes time!

None of this is to say, though, that physicality has no place in my world. Rough oral or delivering sensations with a set of nipple clamps or a pinwheel can certainly amplify a harder-edged mental scene.

While there is a place for roughness, there is also a (much bigger) place for care. Setting negotiated tasks benefitial to the submissive, leaving people better than I found them, and being sweet, affectionate, and cuddly (you can never have enough cuddles!) are important to me as well. Finding a balance between these sides of my personality is definitely a work in progress (especially internalizing the fact that the hard edge is actually desirable)!

In the vanilla world, I'm a software engineer on an accessibility team at a big tech company. I enjoy languages and linguistics, talking to the global blind community, reading, learning new things, and exploring systems of all sorts.

If you live in the Seattle area or travel here often and any of this interests you, feel free to reach out via PM! All Reddit chat responses will be ignored: it's difficult for me to access from my third-party client, so I don't check it often, and it tends to attract low-quality respondents. For bonus points, record a voice clip and I'll send one in exchange! Voice is a big part of physical attraction for me, akin to a photo for many sighted people. (reddit doesn't always like Vocaroo links for some reason, so remove the dot from the link when messaging and I'll add it back in when I receive your message).