No, not literally - it's not that odd of a request. But on that note I want to preface - although my idea has many ties into a D/s dynamic, that is not my initial aim. It's something that we can grow into if it happens naturally, but the meat and bones of this is not inherently sexual, nor am I seeking an immediate dynamic. Although, I do realize where I'm posting so I'm open to incorporating those aspects as we progress.

With that out of the way, here's the schtick - I'm sensitive, and I hate it. I take things personally, I hold grudges, and - to be completely blunt - have recently struggled to not be pessimistic. But I'm not looking for a savior, or a therapist, or someone to vent to. I want tough love. I want someone who can teach me how to take any form of abuse - real or imagined - and shrug it off. Trained apathy.

Now, it's important to mention that I am not interested in becoming a doormat, I'm moreso interested in learning to discern friendly from aggressive fire, and being able to react in those two instances all the same.

I've been in a few long-term dynamics in the past and in pondering this quandary I found a lot of potential links. For whatever reason I love degradation in the bedroom but can't handle it outside, perhaps that's something to explore. I think maybe I have an ego problem, which is maybe why the idea of ego death within servitude appealed to me so much. I think there's a lot of layers and overlap between the two - mentorship, tasks, challenges, control, guidance, etc.

May not appeal to most of you, but if anyone has experience with this in some way, or wants to take on the challenge of mentoring me through it, I'd love to kick around some ideas. I'm at my wit's end and open to whatever thoughts come to mind.

A little about me - I work in a restaurant, I'm a creative outdoorsy type in my spare time. I like to learn and explore. I'm attractive and active, with a curvy body type.

Thanks all! Happy hunting :)