I read a whole lot about people's preferenes here on reddit, as to what people find physically attractive or desirable. On some of the topics where people are complaining about something that sounds like a real handicap in the dating world, many people will say, "you're just being insecure", or "stop being insecure".

To me, they are being dismissive, and have not lived in that person's shoes.

So, at what point is something looked upon by other readers as a true hurdle for the person that is complaining?

I find it very frustrating that people's concerns or experiences are somewhat denied, why the people replying mostly spout idealism.