I had aya two days in a row. The first one was difficult in the beginning but beautiful in the end. I learned a lot from that session, and I felt free and full of life.

However the second day was horrible, I felt like something sucked the life out of me, and the girl next to me was feeding off of it and I had no way to protect myself. The guy next to her was having a very hide time, puking and suffering and this girl next seemed like she was enjoying it and like she can never have enough. She got naked under her covers, and danced in some kind of fucked up, greedy euophoria taking other people's life source. I felt drained and I just wanted it all to stop, the music, her laugh, her movements, all of it. The guides tried helping, but I just felt like this was not my journey, that I shouldn't have done the second day, and that I'm healthy and whole and other people are not and they will wanna take parts of me. Today I just feel drained and I wish I could forget the second day altogether and focus only on the first, but the first day seems like a distant memory. I didn't puke either times, but I can barely eat since.

I feel like I've been set back in my journey, I was doing so well with therapy before, and now I feel lost and not sure what to do or how to get out of it. The first session released a lot of fears and doubts and the second brought them all back. Please help, and please be kind, I'm already going through a lot