So I don't tend to make a lot of plans these days, and my antisocial tendencies have been especially bad these last few months.

As I'm sure many of you know, today is 4/20, and being a stoner, I see it as a holiday and like to celebrate in a small way each year. Well yesterday, my bestie and her cousin (who I'm also good friends with) invited me over to spend the holiday together. I said I would love to, I just wouldn't be free til evening because I had stuff to do.

Now fast-forward to today, the evening has come and gone. I waited to see if they might text, and neither of them has. Texted the both a couple times on a group text with us three, and called each of them. No response, no answers. It's almost 9:30pm. It's only been about 30 minutes since I called them both, about 45 since I texted. But it's kinda wild to me that they both would have forgotten and neither of them would be near their phone. It just feels like they forgot about me or are for some reason avoiding me.

I keep trying to tell myself that doesn't make sense, they specifically invited me over, I'm really good friends with both of them (again, one is my bestie), and I JUST saw them last night. When I left last night, everything seemed good, so I don't know why they would be avoiding me now...

But my brain just keeps bouncing between "they must not want me around" and "of course they forgot about me, I'm so forgettable my besties don't even notice when I'm not there"

I really need a hug 🥺😢

Update:

I guess my bestie went to a game party and her cousin—who, tbf, was the main person who invited me—fell asleep. Cousin just called me and I guess I'm gonna go over and hang out after all.

Feels weird now though, like I basically already had a frickin emotional upset over the whole thing. I guess it just goes to show how stupid and self-destructive my brain is about these things. Sure wish I could handle things in a normal way.