Hi,

My name is Cole. I'm 25 and I've been an athlete my whole life. I skateboarded since I was 12, was a varsity athlete in school, did everything you could think of an active kid doing. In my later years I've hiked a lot. About a year and a half ago after driving from California to Wisconsin I felt a type of pain in what I thought was my glutes that I had never felt. I stretched it off and kept pushing through life. I started school in Wisconsin at 24 years old, and other than that long car trip never felt the pain until spring of last year after studying for finals. I couldn't walk right because of the same pain. I couldn't get an MRI because I was poor and not on state insurance. It went away but again came back in the fall of last year. I got a handicap pass temporarily and transitioned to BadgerCare Plus (Medicaid) and started the process of finding a diagnosis. I got an MRI on Monday of this week and my sports medicine doctor referred me to rheumatology and suspects that I have an autoimmune disorder(disease? Idk what to call it) because apparently my sacroiliac joints are extremely inflamed, which makes a lot of sense to me. After all of that I have a high suspicion that I have ankylosing spondylitis but I'm no professional. I fit every description of it though. I see my rheumatologist in June and start taking Celebrex today. I guess my purpose of writing this is I feel incredibly alone in this experience. It feels like my body is failing at a young age and that I'm just screwed for life. I've been delaying getting back to being active with this naive hope that I was injured, and now it feels like I've lost a piece of me that's kept me wanting to be alive like skateboarding or hiking or just moving around in any quick or excited fashion. I've always been active, even since this has been bothering me I've ran a 5k and done a 10 mile hike. I really try to ignore it but it feels so awful on my spine that I sometimes don't even want to stand up or even try. Does it get better once I find a doctor, or do I just get worse from here on? I haven't told anyone, but I'm truly scared, is that normal? Am I being a baby? I apologize to vent and over share but I don't feel assured by anything I just feel like everyone's looking down on me with puppy dog eyes and just sad and worried and it almost makes it worse. Do you guys feel this way? Am I rushing to conclusions? I want to think positive but its been so long and I'm so young and very healthy it's hard to think it isn't an autoimmune issue. Anyways if you read all this thanks I hope you're well and had a good day.