Hi everyone,

Looking for some advice as I’m hugely struggling with a new job. I am a project manager in an office environment.

I am not finding the work difficult, I am very smart and I can do the work easily. But I am finding I’m absolutely exhausted it’s causing my brain to stop working, the instructions from my boss are unclear and often spoken so I have to write things down (which I then miss), two members in the team are extremely unprofessional and hostile it’s making it harder for me to do my job (I have to work with them so can’t just ignore them) and I have no accommodations so I’m commuting during rush hour for 2 hours per day, 3 days a week to an office with bright lights and no natural light.

I’ve been working from home more this week and let my boss know I wasn’t feeling great and she was a bit hostile (she knows I’m autistic as I told her on day 1 but I don’t think she really understands what that means). She asked me what was going on with me, then said she’s asked one of the HR team to reach out to me to discuss workplace support (I’m a bit miffed she shared my disability info without asking because in the UK that’s illegal) and then said they might be able to help with a few things but also “this is just how we do things here so you’ll have to decide if it’s the right place for you”. She wasn’t kind or understanding at all throughout the whole conversation. She is a very senior person in the company and in my experience at that level they don’t really understand how regular people live their lives and we have a lot more going on then they do (because they can pay for help).

Im also struggling with 2 people in the team being really rude and constantly criticising my work or my style. It’s hard to talk to my boss about this as often complaining about other team members makes it look like you are unprofessional or you can’t work with other people. I have also already told her one of the team was very hostile so I feel like raising it again with someone else makes me look bad.

I want to hold onto this job as the pay is really good but it’s caused autistic burnout and I’m not enjoying it at all. However if I quit I have no idea what else to do. The job market for disabled people is horrible and it took me nearly 2 years of applying for jobs just to get this one, and I was so happy about it when I got it.