I was going to tell this to my friend, but I don't want him to hate me, so I'll just post it here.

I came home from school at 5pm (I had one class, but I left at 9 am because I like getting a private study room on campus). My mum was in a good mood that morning and seemed fine when I came home. She cooked two things and was gonna put both on my plate, then I told her I only wanted one. She got livid and started screaming at me, telling me that I can do whatever I want, that she wasted her life raising a failure, that if I wanted to starve I could, that I'm filthy etc. I messed up by muttering "Jesus Christ" under my breath (she heard me) and started slamming doors and berating me.

This morning before I left, she highlighted some things she wanted to do (go to the supermarket, cook etc). But when I said I was heading out, she said OK... and when I went to say goodbye, she seemed pretty cheerful. And now she's so angry... I just don't understand. I didn't ask her to cook for me. There's dining on campus, and I was going to eat out until she mentioned she was gonna cook later.

I wish I had stayed home. She got suspicious and asked me if I was really doing my work and going to class. I just like being in the study room before my afternoon class. It's quiet, soundproof, and most importantly, she's not there. I feel guilty, depressed, and miserable. I feel like she'll bar me from ever going back to campus. I hate myself.

I never asked for anything. I never asked to be born. I never asked for her to move with me. I never asked her to cook for me. She does it on her own and then gets mad.