I wanted to come and complain to people who will understand

tw: talk about body image, weight, etc.

I have been underweight or close to it for most of my life. I always loved to eat and I have a rather big appetite but my digestion is really fast. Being told I am too small and skinny has sort of become a part of my identity without me wanting it to. After my teenage growth spurts have stopped, i gained a little weight but the stress from university made me lose it all quickly.

Now, after a very tumoltous time in my life, I have found a good job, moved in with my partner and got married. I stress a lot less, and my appetite has returned. I gained weight and i am heavier than i ever have been.

I am still a healthy weight. In fact, my weight is at its healthiest, finally not near the underweight range... I wanted this to happen. Yet i am upset

Its not that i think i am fat but just the change itself. It happened relatively fast and i feel like my body isnt my own. I find the fact that it has changed uncomfortable. I find that I have lost a label I carried all my life and it is stressful.

But the people in my life dont get it. They all reassure me that i am not fat, that it is a good thing, that i am healthier now... They dont understand that i know all that and the weight itself isnt what bothers me. It is the change i find very difficult.

I guess i just wanted to complain to people who might understand it all better. Thanks for reading all the way through