I still have sugar babies messaging me. I'm not looking to be in anything like that. There's like 1000s of guys on here who are into that

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Honestly I've used reddit plenty of time and for the most part I rarely ever find what I want. I'm not vanilla in the slightest so I always find my way back here since I can't ever exist in a vanilla relationship nor will I ever attempt to. I often run into issues on here because most women I run across are either, looking to sext or aren't serious at all.

A little about me. I'm single, 37 black male, no kids, live alone, happy with life and healthy. I'm just single. I'm single because as I mentioned I'm not vanilla even 1%.

Outside of sex I love to travel, cook, I'm on a weight loss journey, and have lost 130lbs since last year. I LOVE to laugh. That's a huge plus for me. Whether we're friends, fwb, or in a relationship I need to be with a woman that I can chill and be goofy with. A healthy lifestyle is important to me also, I don't drink or smoke but I don't mind if you do as long as it's nothing crazy of course.

What I like sexually: Face slapping, spitting in your face, some punching (safe body and safe face punching). I'm a huge sadist so I like using my hands to SAFELY abuse you. I love verbal degradation. The worst you can take the better. Choking and breath play is always fun.

What kinda woman I want: A MASOCHIST OR PAIN SLUT 🥰. They're always a huge plus. A woman who likes to be degraded, abused, and gets off to it. A woman who knows what she wants. A submissive woman.

What I'm NOT looking for: A sugar baby. I'm not a sugar daddy. I can't be with a woman whos not nice. I don't want any dominant woman. It won't workout with me at all. I'm 100% dominant and don't mesh with dominant or switch women.

Things can change depending Our dynamic. I'm open to fwbs, or working towards a relationship. With that being said here are some specific things for each dynamic:

Fwb: I'm ok with being with someone who only wants a sexual dynamic. I understand there are lots of women who desire men like me. Desire rough sex, abuse, and dark stuff but want act on it in a SAFE ENVIRONMENT. In order for us to be FWB you have to share std results. Can't be in a marriage or secretly stepping out of you relationship. I'm not doing any drama what so ever. My life is happy and drama free. I'm just missing the sexual aspects because what I want is rare. Stay in your vanilla relationship and leave me alone.

Relationship: I'm definitely open to having the right woman to be committed with. We all want that person and wanted to be understood. I'm traditional on regards to dating. That means I believe the man should lead and provide. I belive on having romance and love. While being able to act on these dark sadistic thoughts. I don't want a woman to be a stay at home wife but she'd have that option. I say that because people gave their passions and desires. For example, if I met a submissive woman who.....plays basketball or does some hobby, then who am I to tell her to QUIT her career or passion and come sit at home for me? What I'd provide is the environment for to do it if she wants. As long as she understands that I'm the head and she's submissive then fine. I'm possessive, controlling and like to give orders. I want a woman who likes to be lead. A 24/7 tpe fits me.

Distance: most of us on here looking are looking because we can't just find someone across the street that matches up with our desires so with that being the case, I'm open to long distance to start. A requirement is that you're open to meeting. I'm ok with flying out to see a woman I meet from here who's serious. After that you should be interested and able to fly out to me. Of course if we're in a relationship then I'd make sure you get back and forth. AGAIN I'm not looking for a sugar baby or a gold digger

What WONT work. If you identify with any of this then we won't work at ALL: You ONLY want to talk on Reddit. I don't have time for it. Yea let's start chatting here but we're gonna have to move to another app. So we can exchange pics, videos and verify ourselves. So if you wanna chat on here for weeks then I'm not for you. We won't work if you're in a relationship and secretly using this because you're unfulfilled. Again my life is drama free and happy. No one is worth disrupting that. You're idea of "rough sex" is spanking and bondage only. I mentioned what I like and its some rough stuff. I like what I like and I want us both to like it.

I like a woman whos into more traditional style of dating. I'm possessive and controlling I've 10 plus years in the bdsm community so I know how to perform all acts SAFELY. Meaning I don't want to break a bone, cut you, send you to the hospital, or anything crazy like that. You can choke, slap, punch, SAFELY and not give someone a headache. I'm big on aftercare.

My limits: things I just mentioned as well as anything ILLEGAL. No scat, blood play or permanent scarring

If you actually read this then tell me your favorite brand of water when you message me. Don't be surprised if I never respond at the fact that you didn't read this. Looks wise I don't really have a preference beside you being a cisgender woman. If you're reading this then you know how rare it is to find someone of substance who shares our kinks and isn't crazy, or married. The biggest requirement I have especially if you're looking for long term, is want to adhere to a healthy lifestyle. I've lost weight and I lift. I want to lose more. Let's motivate each other.

If you read all of this and you're serious then message me.