"It is time for the CPA to go," declared SprinklyDinks, the firebrand MP for Robertson to a crowd of adoring supporters with hearts in their eyes and a song in their hearts.

"Look, I'll admit. It wasn't easy for us entering into government with the CPA. None of us wanted to do it, but we were forced to. We had that record investment in education spending that was secured last term, and we knew that it had to be preserved. That $35b has been doing absolute wonders for our schools, especially here in Robertson.

You know, I've visited literally countless schools here, and all around I see the same thing -- the money is starting to roll in. These schools used to be under resourced, and we saw teachers running around, burning themselves out, doing everything they could for our kids. But it wasn't enough. No matter how hard they worked, they couldn't make something from nothing. Now, they've got what they need, and believe me, any parent in Newcastle could tell you that it is making a world of difference. Things are getting a hell of a lot better.

And we needed to defend that. It was vital. The CPA had made clear their intentions to scrap it, so we got in there and we said we'd form government, making it a condition of the deal that that funding be untouched. And so it was. Thanks to that decision, which was a painful one, Australian school children were able to continue getting that funding they needed. If we had allowed the CPA to run amok, then they'd have torn up a lot of the work that we have already done. That's work to invest in hospitals, in schools, in infrastructure.

I mean, don't get me wrong. It's not like they're the only problem party. After all, just tonight the LNP called all of rural and regional Australia 'nowhere towns' that don't deserve funding. Griffo called funding for regional hospitals and transport networks 'little pet projects.' It's just totally dismissive of people outside of the major cities and yes, that includes every one of you. We're not Sydney, so the LNP want to give us nothing.

And look, right now it's clear that the only governing partner the CPA have is the LNP. So whether it's JacquesBoot or Model-Ico here, the fact is we won't get any funding. We'll see Griffo make it a condition of support that no money is given to what he calls 'nowhere towns,' because he thinks that any investment outside of his ivory Canberra tower is just pork barrelling. It's not. It's investment to make your lives better and change this country for the better. JacquesBoot will be constrained by the LNP and unable to deliver any investment; model-ico will make the conscious decision to give us nothing."

The crowd boo and hiss, for they hate these politicians that do not truly represent them.

"You know what we delivered as part of our government with the CLP? We delivered a massive $9 billion to upgrade rail in Newcastle. Griffo, the leader of the LNP, why he'd call that pork barrelling. He'd say that it's 'wasted money' on a 'nowhere town.' Well, what I say, is that it was a massive transport investment that means people can get to where they need to go. People who can't afford a car, or who can't drive due to a disability, they now have the option to travel when they need healthcare. Previously, they were forced to rely on friends giving them lifts, or an outdated bus network, or they were forced to reduce themselves to walking, struggling all the way to the GP. Not anymore. And it's thanks to the Socialist Party.

If re-elected, you best believe that that'll keep coming. We understand that people need investment. People need their services to be funded so that they can unlock their potential. People deserve to have that funding in health, in education, in transport. We want to continue to roll out hospitals to underserviced areas, because it's not just a policy that's a nice to have -- no, it's an essential. It's a policy that will save lives.

Tomorrow, you have a choice. You can choose to elect MPs that don't care about you, that haven't been out here talking to you, and who see you as nothing more than another so called 'nowhere town.' Alternately, you can re-elect me, and I will continue to fight tooth and nail, as I always have, to serve the people of Robertson. I think it's an easy choice."

The crowd goes absolutely nuts over this seminal speech, which is called "the best ever."