"Leongatha, hello! Every time I get to come down here to speak with local residents, it is always a massive pleasure, and today, I'd like to talk to you about a key achievement of mine as PM. Getting the phone call that model-slater had tragically passed was truly saddening, but knowing that I had been trusted as leader of this great nation was even more humbling. As I always have, I immediately got hard to work on trying to make the best of my new position.

Legislation, passing new laws, however, was all out of reach. Implementing regulations by consulting with ministers was the only thing I could do, which was really frustrating, but I wanted to make the best of it. So I spoke to the Finance Minister. Enacting policy orders directing departments is one of the thing that ministers can do directly, so do you know what I asked him to do?

Daunting, it might have been, sure, but I went up to him, and I told him, do you know what Leongatha needs? Railways. In the past, I've had a good relationship with this guy, even got him on board with a rail line to Briagolong, so I was hopeful, and here's what he said to me! 'No, this can't go on any longer, Leongatha needs its railway line back!'"

Kids and adults in the crowd all simultaneously cheer. Despite the fact that the Finance Minister never said this, they are like raucous little apes at the suggestion he may have.

"Railway connections are what a community needs to survive, thrive, and grow, and you know what I can tell you? In my meeting with the finance minister, he agreed to bring one back to South Gippsland! VLocities will soon be barrelling down this railway line! Inbound comes jobs and growth, and outbound goes unemployment and stagnation!

Now, while some of the Canberra insiders may have been displeased that I didn't follow the proper regulations in this decision, what would you prefer folks? Getting things actually done with grit and integrity, or a weak leader who doesn't do anything unless it's been approved by 100 limp-wristed civil servants?"

Nary a soul in the crowd is quiet, as they all roar like hyenas at the Prime Minister's comparison. Oppression of the needs of South Gippslanders by Canberra is finally over!

"What I thought, folks!"