I’m not a parent. I’m 26 atm, crappy flashbacks from years ago just make me ponder. There won’t be any consequences for responding however you think. I’m just curious what people think should have been done in that situation.

Basically, my parents were pretty burned out years ago. We (parents, me(12-ish yo), my brother(6-ish yo) and sister (4-ish yo)) kept going on those looong vacation trips abroad. Must have been taxing on them. I do remember them complaining that they can’t go sightseeing as they’d want to because all of us would immediately complain. (which was correct) And we really did end up not doing that most of the time (the parents did not spend time as they’d like to). We went to the beach a lot, which the kids loved but to my parents was only a middle ground.

The issue is, my mom really wanted to sunbathe topless, which to my 12-yo self felt incredibly humiliating. I did not want to look at her like that. At all. I kept making dramas (which usually took the form of me refusing to stay close as long as she was topless, turning my head away whenever she was near, approaching the family only when I needed to eat while constantly refusing to look). Admittedly, it must have hurt her… My siblings did mimic me at first, which really irritated my dad cause it was clear I was the only one truly freaking out, but then they usually ended up getting bored and having fun anyway.

It got kinda bad during one trip when we were camping near some famous nudist beach. My parents both insisted on going there. Sort of “they already gave up on so many things because of us, so they will go there whether I want to or not”. We ended up spending several days there, all of which were pure torture to me. Internally, I was freaking out. Looking at the naked people made me freeze. Thinking of my parents being identically hairy and naked as the strangers made me freeze. I felt both disgusted and humiliated by just imagining that, or myself interacting with them as if it was normal. We ended up on the border of the beach, where I immediately went to the non-nudist side and again, totally refused to interact or even acknowledge my parents’ existence until they wore clothes. They decided to let me be, because I was a drama queen and “would get bored of it eventually”. Which imo was a fair decision… I had the choice of remaining on the other side of the beach. We intentionally camped there. I was not forced to undress with them. But then I have to admit this really hurt. The few days we spend there, I was utterly lonely, disgusted, sort of frozen, afraid to look left where the nudist side was. I kept catching glimpses of hairy dongs hanging between people’s legs only praying that I’ll never come across my parents like that. Most of the time I spent terrified. We were overseas so I had no one to talk to and my parents had no one to leave me with…

I don’t really blame them. I mean, I WAS a drama queen and I understand why they’d want something for themselves. They really did give up on a lot during vacations. They deserved something just for themselves as well… I just wonder what should have been done there… Even if it was fair, it did end up with me getting traumatized. I still freeze/react defensively whenever I catch a glimpse of anything the like and do get flashbacks of loneliness/betrayal/disgust whenever I’m at the sea. This example probably wasn’t the only reason why but a part of it nonetheless :/

Was there any way out of it? Hell, I really do wonder what should have been done there. There were some (nice) attempts to talk me out of that stuff / make me come close despite the nakedness but all failed. My mom ended up putting on clothes for about an hour once, but then taking them off, convinced by father (who was seriously angered by my silent threats/acts of disgust). Admittedly, I WAS a drama queen and I did hurt them. I am not trying to glorify my perspective, it made sense for him to be angry. How would a good parent deal with that sort of burnout & dramatic kid? Really, any thoughts are appreciated