I'm not sure if this is a phenomena that mostly affects men (due to socialization under the patriarchy) or if it's something that affects both. I've always heard other men talk about this but I always assumed it was exaggerated/bullshit and just random misogynistic whining until I started dating women.

I'll explain what I'm talking about with an example:

I'm finishing up work, pretty chill. I get a call, it's someone that I've been talking to. Met up at my place and hers a few times. I pick up the phone wanting to talk to her and get roped into an hour and a half conversation about how her roommates are awful (they did something extremely minor, like say that they didn't want a dogsitter to come over without meeting them) and it makes her cry. So I sit there and listen and I guess just kind of...emotionally regulate this complete and utter life crisis until next week when a similarly completely inconsequential crisis means we have to talk about it for forever.

It's absolutely exhausting. It's happened, at one point, with like everyone I'm seeing and it usually repeatedly happens.

The craziest time was when I was in the hospital with a separated shoulder (bad throw at wrestling) and just trying not to scream when someone I was talking to (notably a different woman from the other example I just gave) was extremely distressed that she didn't go to class (law school) because of anxiety. So I'm sitting there in the hospital trying not to scream and telling her "I'm in the hospital, can I call you back" (shockingly the answer is no) and then she gets concerned for a few minutes...and then spends the next half hour just sobbing about not going to class while I'm trying to reassure her and not to scream because my shoulder hurts.

This happens...often. Like no matter what bad shit happens, could be kidnapped by aliens, I feel like on top of that bad shit I'm going to get SOMEONE calling me to say "Heyyyyyy this minor neurotic thing I have is causing me an internal crisis can you listen to me while you're getting anally probed?"

And I've heard other guys express this same sentiment and that it sucks but like, it is what it is, if you want to date or be FWB with a woman it's just what you have to deal with.

But do men do the same thing? I don't date men so I wouldn't know.