Long story short, my wife had a hard time over the years being open about things she’s into, etc. We were drinking and she told me she likes to be dominated and I’m not really like that with her. She said other exes would tell her how sexy she looked and just were more dominant in bed etc. In the past i stopped initiating and taking charge because of how hot and cold she is. One day she is horny all over me and the next if i approach her sexually or slap her ass/make comments she gets all weird. And the rejection from the ups and downs made me in a very neutral state to where i don’t initiate or be playful at all because i hate the rejection feeling.. I hate the feeling to the point that i won’t even try because she asks for one thing then acts another. I just wait for her to be in that mood to match her energy. I told her this honestly and she said she was happy that i told her and was open and then she apologized and told me she loved me and doesn’t want me to feel rejected. but it seems now she is a little distant and hasn’t wanted sex. This is what i mean. It drives me nuts. From a woman’s perspective wtf is going on. She has some mental issues as well. Anxiety, childhood trauma etc.