What’s something a sexual partner said to you in the past, especially when younger and more impressionable, that you let affect you, only to later realise it was asshattery (or ignorance) on their part?

I’ll go first.

• One guy said ‘How are you so wet? Is it some discharge problem or something?’. 😐 For years at the back of my mind I thought there was SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME for getting wet when aroused. Seriously.

• One guy was sliding his hand down to my pants and stopped and said ‘Oh, you have a belly. I’ve never been with a girl with a belly.’ 😐 This of course nicely added to the already rampant pressure by diet culture and lifelong chase of a flat stomach and fighting my own shape.

• And of course the classic many bigger girls have heard in their life: ‘I love how horny you get, I love how fat girls are always so eager and grateful.’ 😐 Talk about a mindfuck that touches so many different areas from self-image to sexuality and self worth.

So happy to now know what utter rubbish all these things were and how they had nothing to do with me really, just some stupid things some stupid boys said. It’s just sad how much space I gave them at the back of my mind and what they did to my self-image when younger.