I know it’s to be expected on some level, but is it a cause for concern if almost all my attraction towards a lady disappears for awhile after ejaculation to the point that I question whether I even find them attractive and whether I like their personality? During this time small frustrations that I had been overlooking seem more significant as well.

Some people call it post nut clarity but surely if you actually like someone besides pure sexual attraction you should still feel a sense of tenderness and affection toward them even when your libido diminishes in the refractory period?

Or is it normal to feel like this for a while after you break the horny spell?

I feel like a judgemental asshole but I can’t help but feel that way sometimes with thoughts like ‘damn, did I really find her that attractive just a minute ago?’ ‘how can I politely wrap this up and ask her to leave?’

I don’t actually convey these thoughts or anything that would make them feel unwanted , usually within about half an hour I’m back to finding them sexy again.

But there was one lady I dated briefly who I was enraptured with, who even after orgasm I felt like I just wanted to be close with - is that a sign that someone is good long term relationship material?

Or is it dumb to make decisions during that period since it’s an abnormal mind state?