50F, 175lbs, 5’8”, White, Diagnosed with bipolar w/ mixed features, BPD, OCD, PTSD, anxiety, interstitial cystitis, and fibromyalgia.

For years, I have been taking Trintellix 10mg daily, Abilify 10mg daily, Buspar 7.5mg 3 times a day, gabapentin 300mg 3 times a day, Zanaflex 4mg 3 times a day, and estradiol 4 mg daily. Three weeks ago, I totally ran out of my meds and am not in a position to see my doctor for refills or to purchase my of my meds. I have no insurance.

I have found myself in a terrible place both mentally and physically. Each day, I think that I can’t possibly feel any worse, yet I find myself feeling worse and worse with every passing day. I have an overwhelming sense of dread. I feel completely hopeless and helpless. I have extreme brain fog. I have body aches. My nerves are absolutely shot. I feel like my brain simply isn’t working properly. Being off my meds has made my interstitial cystitis worse than ever. I’m experiencing bad insomnia. I feel like every passing minute is too much to bear. It makes me not want to exist. I just overall feel absolutely awful mentally and physically. I just started a new job , and I am really struggling to get by. I’m not retaining my training properly, and trying to make it through an 8 hour shift feeling like I do is torturous.

My question is am I experiencing withdrawal symptoms after three weeks, or is this just what I am going to be like not being on my meds? If it’s withdrawal symptoms, when can I expect to find some relief? Thank you for your time.