English is my second language so excuse me if I write badly At an early age, I got into a religious family, but my parents are not just parishioners, the stepfather of the pastor of the church. Their religious madness began to grow with a threat to my life. Today, with another quarrel, I looked into the eyes of a madman, my stepfather is trying to tell me for God with madness. For example, he believes that God created man in such a way that nothing happens when a drug addict is beaten. He thinks that drug addicts should be beaten. He found out that I was smoking weed. He no longer just punishes me, but bluntly beats me. I threatened to call the police, then he got even more furious. Since the age of 8, I do not feel safe in my home and family. Mom, as the only native person, does not help me. I don't even have anyone to go to because I was not allowed to associate with non-Christians. I just don't know what to do. I'm 17 years old and I can't get a job to combine with my university studies, I'm just desperate. I think about suicide very often.