I will try to make this quick.

My ex and I had been together for approximately 4 years. We have gone through three break-up make upcycled this being the 3rd. The first one lasted almost nine months, the second three months this one is 60 days in.

In the past I suspected what she was but this time around I have been going to therapy and while my therapist can't officially diagnose her it definitely looks like npd.

The previous two times she never started dating or seeing anybody else this time she told me never to speak to her again because I sent her flowers and a long text as an apology for a silly argument we had.

How much previous two times this time I texted her back saying don't ever contact me again this relationship has been abusive and I need to protect myself.

The day after Christmas she showed up without notifying me to drop off some clothes and a few things that had been left at her house and I didn't react or say anything basically just said thank you and went back inside.

Approximately a week ago I found out that she had cheated on me a few times with another woman who claimed to be a friend of both of ours. This really set me because she would constantly accuse me of cheating or suspect me of it when I never did.

Since The Break-Up 2 months ago I will see her once every week or so at a local bar where we both have a lot of friends. She would do weird things like make it very obvious that she was ignoring me, such as sitting directly across from me and talking in a very loud voice to try to get me to notice her, conveniently bumping into me physically when walking past and a few other things like that. Since we have been through this before I know it is some way of being close to me without being close to me. At least that's what I think and could use some clarification on that.

The thing I could really use some help with is this: When I found out about the cheating I happened to see her there and at this point I was really hurt and angry so I walked up to her and this time she was making eye contact until I smiled and in a very nice voice with no yelling or anything like that flat out told her that I knew about her cheating and who she had done it with. When I did this she squeeze her eyes shut and turned her head. What does this behavior signify?

The issue is that we live four blocks away from each other and since we have a large circle of common friends we are bound to run into each other like this and it would be really nice if we could just proceed like normal people. From past experience with her, I know it's just a matter of time before she misses me and tries to come back because I can say that I'm the best man she has ever been with in a relationship and I know this because not only has she told me but others who I trust have told me this as well.

She also has me blocked on social media except for her Instagram and well I admit it wasn't the best thing to do I sent her a few angry texts basically telling her that if she continues to to provoke me I will continue to call out in public unless she apologizes for what she has done. I also said that we have known each other for a long time oh, she's not fooling me and I don't want to see her around town in two years as a drunk person circling the drain and ruining their life.

I realize that most NPD behaviors are subconscious and while the gaslighting and emotional abuse and the cheating did hurt I am trying my best not to demonize her or anybody else with NPD and and mostly seeking to understand it.

Any insight or advice would be greatly appreciated.