I am sorry if this question does not belong here. If you can think of a subreddit that is more fitting, I would appreciate it.

I also do not mean to offend anyone, I just had this weird thought and wondered if anyone ever had it too.

Context: I am a lesbian, I have been in a loving and committed relationship with my gf for 8 years now. I have always known that I want children, she does not.

When I think about my options now I suppose it’s either adopting or using a donor. I have always wanted to adopt, even before I knew that I was gay (which was very young lol). However, I am about to finish law school in my country, and I have learnt just how grim reality is. The process blows my mind, from how many years it takes, to the circumstances that the child has to go through during the process, to my low chances of actually succeeding given the fact that I’d be considered a “single parent”. (My girlfriend wants to be more of a “step-parent” and for example, not be in the birth certificate, which is totally fine by me.)

I have no qualms about being a single parent. Still, I do not feel comfortable with the idea of an “anonymous donor”.

I have a couple of gay male friends that I love deeply who know that I want to have kids etc. and they have brought up the fact that they would gladly have a kid with me. It’s always half joking, but the idea has kind of “grown on me” or intrigued me, or something.

This has lead me to wonder, for the first time in my adult life, what kind of man I would like to have a child with and what that would look like.

Does this sound crazy?