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Dating/hook-up apps and covert racial/ethnic segregation?
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I'm an Hispanic living in the US, in NC.

A couple of months ago, I started using the apps for the first time (mainly Scruff, sometimes Grindr), and over time I started noticing an interesting pattern that has gotten stronger and stronger. Despite the user-base on these apps being majority White, Non-Hispanic, most of the conversations that progress past the initial introductory "hi" message actually have come from Black and Hispanic men.

I find this phenomenon very interesting in many aspects:

  1. I proportionally spend much more time at woofing/tapping/messaging White men, but success rate has been literally zero. Most of the times they completely ignore my interaction, and in the rare case where a conversation does happen, it somehow dies soon after.
  2. Contrary to what I've seen on the Internet, the profiles I do interact with do not have the usual overt discriminatory text in their profile: "no fats, no fems, no spice...". They just list what they're looking for, what they do, interests, etc.
  3. As previously stated, the people who take the initiative of interacting with me are mostly Black and Hispanic men. A curious observation: despite my profile being written in English (never disclosing that I know Spanish), at least three people have introduced themselves in Spanish. Two of these people I had substantial conversations with, and one of them eventually led to my first time having sex.

I guess that I'm writing this to see if anybody has had a similar experience than me (perception that the apps are covertly segregated), partially because I feel some frustration about having yet another message sent to the void, but also because I'm truly curious to know what sort of experiences other PoC queer men have had on the apps, and hopefully to have a conversation about it.

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3 years ago