I’ve been with him for a year. He’s amazing and is the most securely attached boyfriend I have had. (Reads: attachment styles)

But I’m still learning to be a secure girlfriend. I have a lot of insecurities and self esteem issues that have only surfaced well into our relationship. I have a strong sense of my worth and my self when I am single, but once I commit to someone, it slowly goes away because I often have an unhealthy attachment to my significant other. I am just re-starting therapy now and I’m praying it helps. I’m doing this for not just me but for us.

Today I saw he was texting a girl and she was reacting with hearts to his messages. I let myself start spiraling with negative thoughts (not good) and eventually asked him about it. I was in tears and telling him the reason it’s so hard for me to even ask you is because I know how irrational it is, but my anxiety just tells me lie after lie until I get into this dark space. He showed me it was just his friend and they were taking about work (they work together) and i even know the girl and shes really cool.

So of course I looked like an idiot. I’m just sick of my anxiety telling me lies and telling me something is going on when I have ZERO evidence of anything. He’s SO good to me, loves me SO well, and I just need help with any advice that has helped any of you in these situations.

I’m just worried despite how incredibly patient he is, he’ll have a last straw. So I’m preventing that and I’m working on myself with my therapist and I’m ready to change.