I am a 25F. I only recently started thinking that I have an ED bc i am in nursing school, and I learned what is the definition of anorexia nervosa (ex person does not realize it, they eat few calories in a day). I most likely have had a mild case since i was 15. when i was younger i would think i was so fat even though i was like 100 lbs. the most i ever was was 110 lbs. I had helicopter parents, and would eat less when i got into fights with my parents to make a statement of how i didn't want to eat the food they cooked, so i would starve myself at night.

for the past 4 years, i don't think i'm fat, i know i'm skinny and i have been trying to gain weight. but subconsciously, i don't eat as much calories. mostly due to i hate my parents cooking, and I don't have a lot of time to make meals for myself bc i am studying, and i live with my fiance and he eats a lot, so a lot of the money and time i spend grocery shopping or cooking i would rather he be fed since he eats more in general.

i don't try to control my weight by exercising, but I do notice that whatever weight i do have it goes to my gut, and i think my belly looks "fat." i actually barely exercise bc i am studying and in school all day. for the past few years, i would eat 1 meal (rice and chicken/or eggs) and a snack every day just bc i didn't have much of an appetite and i didn't realize that it's not enough calories per day.

there are days where i eat like crazy and i eat a lot to gain weight (like today) bc i dont want to be anorexic.

i am trying to increase my caloric intake (having more snacks, eating 3 meals a day, pb smoothies) but i feel like i can't keep up with it everyday bc of time and money spent on food.

i dont have health insurance, and ideally i would like to seek outpatient therapy or counseling. what did you do to help yourself or a loved one stay on track to gaining a healthy weight and not being guilty about spending money on food?