So a bit of back story, with TL;DR at the end.

I’ve been with my boyfriend for the last 3 years, and since the beginning it’s been established as being both a poly and kinky relationship where I am the sub. I’ve always considered myself pretty open to different kinks and have liked the idea of being anal/oral only, even before I met him. My boyfriend also likes the idea a lot, but in the past hasn’t want to dive into trying it because he still wanted to be able to fuck my pussy if and when he had the desire to do so.

We started dating another woman a couple months ago, and she is great in so many ways. My boyfriend and our girlfriend have a much more sexual relationship together than I have with her, which has been talked about and agreed upon with all three of us.

I’ve always liked the humiliation side of things when it comes to kinky sex, and in the last couple weeks my boyfriend and I have decided that my pussy is off limits, and that my role is now simply a masturbation aid for him. As I mentioned, I’ve always thought the idea of anal/oral only was really hot, but now the added part that I am simply there to help make sure he feels good and gets off, as well as knowing that he does have another pussy to fuck and feels amazing to him, is REALLY fucking hot.

Now to my question. I do very much want and need to maintain intimacy with my boyfriend, and so does he. We both love and care for each other so much, but neither of us are quite sure how we can keep that physical intimacy and love between us that comes with having face-to-face vaginal sex, yet also still maintain the strong denial aspect that I desperately want and need.

Can anyone help me understand what you do to maintain that intimacy while also enjoying the objectification that comes with this? How did you get over the societal norm of vaginal sex being the only truly intimate way for two people to have sex? Are there any particular positions or styles of anal sex that allow you to still feel that intimacy?

TL;DR: How do you stay intimate with your partner without vaginal sex?