This is one of about a dozen short vignettes that I wrote some 18 months ago in conjunction with the talented and lovable /u/saltedfish, whose long-term friendship and partnership has helped make me a better writer in every sense of the word. These are early stories, written based on image prompts and posted here with only minor editing for pacing or grammatical purposes. Please enjoy.

I don't know how it happened. One second, Ashley is happily drunk and whispering in my ear how we should go upstairs and get it on, and the next she's gushing over her friend Amanda and her infertility problems, and promises that she'll be the surrogate mother for Amanda's baby. And she means it, too.

So that means no sex for me, right? Suddenly, Amanda's boyfriend Rick has acquired sole rights to fertilize my woman, and even if he doesn't actually get to do it au naturale, it still cuts me off from making my regular deposits every other day like I have for the past two years. Ashley's really caught up in this infertility problem, and while she promises me that it'll be just fine once the artificial insemination's taken place, I'm still left with my dick in my hand and no girlfriend to drain it in. Literally. Three weeks of that, and I am on the verge of a mental breakdown. Ashley's been using her mouth, but she's just not very talented at sucking dick, and it usually ends up with her jaw hurting and me having to finish off myself the old-fashioned way. I'm not even sure if it's because she's watched too much porn, or not enough. It's just not good.

One day I come home from work, cock like an iron bar trying to push through my jeans. Ashley's in the kitchen, and the smile she has on her face can only mean one thing. After three weeks of continued tries, Rick's shitty sperm has finally caught on, and my girlfriend is now carrying his belly-fruit inside of her. Why it thrills her so much is beyond me. But it does. And frankly, it annoys me.

"So when can we start fucking again?"

I'm sick of beating around the bush, and Ashley's dress is short enough that I can see her smooth, inner thighs from where I'm standing.

"In a few weeks," she smiles. "Gotta make sure the egg's caught on properly. Oh, this is so exciting! Don't you think?"

"No." I shrug. "Why should I? It's not my kid, and yet I get to see my girl grow fat and bloated with some other dude's spawn, while I'm stuck like a monk at a monastery."

I can see she's hurt, but rather than respond, she just turns her back to me and starts rummaging in a drawer. Angry, I suddenly find myself stepping up and placing a hand between her shoulders. My other hand creeps up beneath her dress to where her underwear should be, but isn't.

"Mike, no..." she protests, but I can tell that she doesn't mean it. Rather than struggle, she lets me bend her over and drag up her dress until her ass is on display an inch from my raging shaft. I grunt, holding her against the kitchen table while my left hand unbuckles my belt and frees my cock. I don't remember ever being this horny, and the thought of another man's seed in her belly makes me irrationally harder.

"Mike, don't, you'll ruin it-- please," she pleads, but she can't stifle a moan as the tip of my cock brushes over her folds and kisses her clit. God, that velvet softness, her lips growing wetter by the second, and knowing that I only need to push my hips forward an inch to feel her around me-- it's almost enough to cum right then and there. But then she says something that gives me pause.

"If you ruin this, you'll have to wait for it all over again..!"

My erection is pulsing against her labia, but I realize that she is right. Here I am, cock harder than a steel bar, and nowhere to put it. Until she chimes up again and reminds me why I love her.

"Fuck my ass instead..."

Christ, this girl..! I can see her pucker, kept between her tight buns but on full display now that she's bent over, and I decide that I can't wait another second. I let go of her back, reach for the bottle of cooking oil, and pour a liberal helping onto the upper crack of her ass. She gasps, but it sounds more thrilled than upset, and I immediately set to work, guiding my cock up to drag the lubricant down to her hole and rubbing it in tight, quick circles until I feel her resistance crumble. The first inch is the hardest, but the oil helps me force myself into her with dogged determination. She moans, and I can tell that she has missed my almost as much as I have missed her; her hand finds her dress and reaches underneath to pull out a breast, which she begins to massage. With my head lodged inside her asshole, I begin to thrust quickly until the oil overcomes the friction and makes for a smooth, deep ride. I can't tell if her moans are those of pleasure or of pain, but at this point, with her tight asshole fitting snugly around my almost painfully hard cock, I honestly don't care. With my thumbs spreading her cheeks apart and prying her hole open for my turgid shaft, I lean into her and pump into her with gleeful exuberance, pressing her bodily against the kitchen counter while snaking an arm around her torso to pull her even tighter onto my cock.

At this point I don't care if she hasn't cleaned out, or even if I'm not helping her cum; three weeks of pent-up need makes me grip her footballer's derriere as I thrust, pump, hammer myself home over and over to the sweet sound of flesh on jiggling flesh. I can see her smile from beneath the curtain of golden hair, her face turned to gaze at me while her body rocks to the rhythm of her getting buttfucked, and before I know it, I feel the tension of my impending orgasm surge within me. I press my face against her neck, groaning with my efforts to preserve this perfect, orgasmic moment for as long as possible, and in the seconds before I erupt I feel her ass clench around me, as if trying to coax as much out of me as possible. Suffice it to say, she gets what she asks for: I press violently forward as the climax takes me, and feel the surge of cum as it shoots and pours in copious ribbons into her tight, tight hole. Heedless of any spillover, I continue to pump myself in and out of her increasingly sloppy hole, until I feel the moment fade, and my fingers unclench around her supple flesh. Panting, and feeling weak in the knees, I pull my cock from its impromptu sheath and pat her ass, while Ashley coos softly back at me. Her cheeks are glowing a healthy pink from the pounding I gave her, and idly, I wonder if the spillover might drip down and ruin the insemination. Hopefully noy-- or we'll just have to do this all over again.

What a tragedy that would be.