My mom is leaving tomorrow, and she will be gone for 1-2 months. We have been spending more time together for the last few weeks in preparation for her leaving. Today, she said that she wants to go to the Korean spa in Seattle, which is 3 hours away. I said I don’t want to, and she was frustrated and basically said I was being mean or unfair. She said she needs to go to the spa to get a massage because her back hurts and she is going to be on the plane soon. I asked why she couldn’t get a massage somewhere closer to us, and she responded that they won’t do it like they do it there. Maybe she researched the local spas and didn’t find one that suits her, but it seems unlikely to me that this random spa she likes to go to is better than everything we have here in Portland. I asked her why she couldn’t go with my dad and without me. I understood that she wanted to spend time with me before she left, but we’ve spent a lot of time together and it will make little difference in the grand scheme of things if she goes with my dad today. She said that’s true, but she doesn’t want to go without me. She agreed with me in words, but with her tone of voice and body language she thought I was being an asshole. I said it’s your decision if you don’t want to go without me. I don’t like being forced into doing things I don’t want to do, and I felt that it’s completely my moms decision to not go if I don’t go. This is the crux of the problem. AITA for not going with my mom so she can ease her back pain? Or is she the asshole for trying to guilt me into coming with her? This is complicated by the fact that she is leaving tomorrow.

A few important points I forgot to mention: I don’t have a good reason for why I don’t want to go to the spa. I’m completely free today. I just have no desire to go. I offered to do something else with my mom, but she repeated that her back hurt and she needed a massage, but it was fine, and then she sulked away as if I was the asshole but she was being graceful. I gave a few suggestions for what we could do instead, but she said no to them.