Ok a little background—so my husband is a pack rat. A huge pack rat. Our tiny apartment is over run by his stuff and it seems that all of it is so special to him. I am a minimalist. I have a hope chest that I go through periodically to decide what still matters and what is no longer a keepsake (these things do change. There are things I saved in high school and I don’t even know why anymore.

So here is what happened—while home alone the other morning I started working on getting the house in order. We need more shelving space. Above the dryer is a large shelf that had all of our mismatched sheets on it. I don’t think we have touched it in at least 2 years. So I scoop it all up, set a few select things aside, and add it to the donate bag.

I’m notorious for driving around with bags like this for lengthy periods of time. But not yesterday. I was feeling ambitious so I took it all straight to goodwill.

Apparently, unbeknownst to me, my husband’s baby blanket was up there. Why stores there? I have no idea. After looking through several other boxes, it seems likely that it go donated. Now, I feel horrible. That will be something he can never replace. I know I’m not the asshole for making a mistake. I even called first thing this morning and figured out the process to try and recover an item. And called 2 additional times when my husband and MIL seemed to think more should be done (I should drive there and demand to be allowed to go through every item until I found it)

Here is the part where I might be an asshole—my husband couldn’t even give a description of his blanket. I had to call my MIL to even know exactly what we were looking for other than blue baby blanket.

And while I have (mostly) avoided saying my thoughts out loud and have chosen to go with sympathy instead, I am finding his reaction ridiculous.

He is treated me unkindly because one of the stages of grief is anger and he is angry at me. He is “grieving” an inanimate object that he can’t even remember what it looks like. I totally get being sad, but grieving it? Being mean to me because of it?

I’m about ready to tell him how ridiculous I find this and that he needs to get some perspective. I plan on doing just that. So am I the asshole