So this happened pretty early in the morning where my mom was downstairs cooking and cleaning for guests that were going to come over in two days, dad went down stairs later. I didn't hear a majority of the conversation, but when I started to hear voices being raised, I went down to see what was going on.

I am quite protective of my mother when it comes to these argument's since I know how stubborn and brash my dad can be. When he gets angry you can't ever try to have a conversation to reason with him, he just shuts down and tells us to not talk to him while making passive aggressive comments under his breath. I sometimes think he's doing it because in the past when he would get angry he would just shout at us, and he was LOUD. This is in the past and he always regrets how reacted, we forgive him.

Regarding this specific fight, it was about cleaning. My mom still works while my dad is retired. Both of them help around the house albeit my mom does a bit more since she hates messes and can be a stressor for her, ESPECIALLY with guests coming over. In our culture, there is a lot of decorum when it comes to these parties, so mom is always stressed when preparing. Not healthy, but its always been this way.

This is where I may have overstepped, I asked my mom 'what happened?' she says that my dad won't help with taking packages down to the basement, so to try and ease the situation and I do it myself. But that doesn't help. It just turns into them over talking one another. One of them saying 'he won't help me cause he said I asked him twice' while the other said 'I didn't say that, it's early and I just want my tea.'

Phrases like 'you get crazy when guests come over' 'you never help me for parties' and 'I always work by myself' were thrown around. I couldn't get a word in.

This culminates to my mother screaming at my dad and just releasing a lot of internalized frustrations (this rare for her to do, but when it does it really upsets me to see that way) and since my dad doesn't want to hear it he just walks up to his room. On the way he point to me to say 'you need to mind your own business, if you didn't butt your nose into every argument, it wouldn't be like this.' I didn't say anything, just went back to my room. No one has spoken to each other since.

I am asking if I am the A-hole because he is right. I hate arguments, they have been an extreme part of my anxiety growing up. All of my bad memories as a child come from these fights. I have always voiced my opinion when it gets like this cause I never want it to escalate. Does it work every time, no, but it can. This time it didn't.

Was I wrong in trying to prevent an argument? Did I just make it worse?