I'm not sure if i worded the title properly. But my boyfriend (M26) and i (F22) have been in a relationship for a year. My boyfriend goes out occasionally (not often) to spend time with his friends, usually at one of his friend's houses. He doesn't like me going out late which is understandable and we've even spoken about it because i also don't like him being out late. he usually goes at night and is back early hours of the morning. the last time i confronted him about it, because i was upset that he was out late.

today one of his friends who lives far away came back for holiday. he went out and played soccer in the evening and then said he was going to go and chill with his friends. i don't mind this and i know i can't stop him from doing things and going out, and that's not my intention, i don't want him to feel like im controlling him. he only came back home at 2am.

i trust him. i know he would never cheat and isn't getting up to anything bad. but i can't help but be upset when he goes out until early hours of the morning. i'm not sure if it's trauma from my previous relationship that caused this (i was cheated on).

Also, a week ago, i was up talking to my cousin until 4am and he had a problem with that, so i just feel like it's a bit hypocritical of him to have a problem about that when he goes out until early hours of the morning to chill with his friends. i was literally at home, with my family. am i over reacting?

i've also been going through some tough stuff lately (i had to have an abortion) and that was about a week ago. i'm having a hard time coping and i feel really hurt and bad because i feel like he doesn't understand. i don't even feel like going out or doing anything because im so down, but he went out and i kind of resent him for it, because i think he doesn't realise how much im affected by this also, even though ive told him and we’ve spoken about it.

i mean what can i expect him to do really? i feel like a terrible girlfriend but at the same time im just so mad at him for some reason. i just need some advice? do other people feel like this when their partner goes out? or am i just being ridiculous? all of these reasons are why i’m upset that he’s out late, idk if im valid or not.

(PS: if any pro lifers come for me, just know it was a mutual decision that had to be done)