My gf (28f) and I (31M) were planning to go on a vacation together this month (in a couple of days actually). We have both been working our butts off to arrange our affairs to be there and be financially prepared. we live in different countries and due to the pandemic, this would have been our first in person visit since meeting. I have been struggling financially for a while and am only just starting to get my own footing, but I still have limited means. She has been in a similar position. In the last few weeks while we've been trying to get our final matters dealt with, she has an urgent large expense last minute. I tried to help her, but came up short and dont have the means or the time to finish assisting her. My options are go on the vacation and try to relax, or send what little i can but we'd still be short of what she needs. I would lose the deposit on the hotel and be charged fees for no-showing as well as not getting a vacation I have been working 3 jobs for the last 8 months to make happen. Skipping the trip and just getting her the full amount would also entail risking my home going into foreclosure. Since I will still be short significantly, following through on the trip makes the most sense to me, then try to plan something else for her later

I feel like this is a spoiled "first world" issue, but I feel awful that I can't help her while being "selfish" in trying to do what I've been trying to make happen. I would ask that we not make remarks on being catfished or comment on the nature of my relationship. I simply would like to know: AITA?

Update: she was upset. She accused me of cheating and not caring, being selfish, etc. I’m attempting to reason with her, but she’s upset at me rn. I know nobody asked for an update, but I appreciate the reinforcement that I’m NTA. I feel a little better about my decision. Still not happy of the overall outcome though