I (24NB) have this friend Mark (23M) and we have been friends for a while. When we both met we immediately clicked as friends.

Eventually I got my own car, and everyone else was carless.

This didn't bother me at the time because I felt pride at being the friend to help them get to job interviews, dr appointments, etc because a lot of us were trying to exit our bum era post-COVID. It felt good to be a part of that, I love seeing my friends grow and succeed.

I helped Mark especially with housing insecurity, jobs, rides, just being there for him. As he was working on his life stuff he would occasionally pay me some gas money, smoke me up, buy me food or a drink. It wasn't quite proportionate to the amount of energy I was spending on him, but I wasn't keeping exact tabs and didn't want to. It was fine.

Over time, though, he started hitting me up for friend activities less and less. There was less chilling out, watching TV, playing video games, going on hikes, going for food etc.

He was suddenly always too tired to do anything, wouldn't ever make an effort to maybe Uber himself or bus to our apartment (some of the friend group became roommates) so I'd always have to give him rides and basically force him to see us. Or else we wouldn't hear from him for weeks, until, surprise, he wanted to get picked up to go run errands for his girl, kill time after work till she got home from work, etc.

And he'd usually offer me something in return for these rides. But it started feeling less like a close friendship, and more like a glorified Uber situation.

So I message him as much. I told him I missed how we used to be, that I feel like he goes above and beyond for other people but not me. I said I appreciate the money and such, but I don't even feel like you actually like being my friend anymore. How I did so much for him, and to be treated like this really hurts my feelings.

Mark responds, absolutely livid. Saying how he always made sure to compensate me, that I was expecting him to act like he was my boyfriend or something.

He said that I dropped him like he was nothing during COVID (even though it's a two way street and he didn't exactly talk much to me either). He said I ruin his night all the time, needing emotional support from him, (I have depression and yes he's "talked me off the edge" a few times) yet I couldn't apparently handle a few months of him "going through it" and being distant. And he said "maybe this is why I'm backing off, you're so dramatic and honestly it's just too much."

He accused me of feeling entitled to his time and money, and said if he was being such a bad friend then maybe we should just stop being friends.

He said a lot of things that really hurt my feelings. I don't think what I said warranted that kind of response, but maybe he's kind of right and I am being dramatic. Maybe I should have been more patient and just accepted what he was already giving me.

So, reddit, AITA?