I’m a young black dood (26m) been with a girl (25m) for about 5 years and I recently had an epiphany. In what seems like the millionth weird situation with my relationship, I am beginning to question myself and if I’m the asshole. I’ll set the premise for how the dynamic usually goes along with a recent example. Usually (and I hate to say it) she’ll either say or do something off the walls and I’ll do my best to try and say something to let her know it’s wrong or in poor taste. THIS ENDS HORRIBLY as in most cases I’m met with a very defensive attitude and a denial that said action was “not cool” or “not something she thinks would cause any trouble”. EXAMPLE: I run a media page that does pretty well for itself and has amassed an audience. A few months back I outsourced shooting footage to a few photographer friends of mine I’ve met throughout my time in my field (cars) and one of them happens to be female. She showed me her page while we were watching a movie in bed the other night and I was confused. She asked simply “do you know her” to which I replied yes of course and mentioned how she has been present at events I send the rest of the film team to. I asked why would she ask so randomly as I had already gushed for hours to her about being so happy that I could have multiple angles filmed now with ease. She’s expressed jealousy and insecurity before so it wasn’t hard to identify the read between the Lines to what she was really asking. Considering I take care of her and home I never understand why she does this. She said she just appeared on her phone. I SNAPPED. I called her on what I knew was a lie and a wicked scheme out of insecurity. She finally admitted that she indeed stalked my my team members activity to see if anything was out of bounds. SHE SAYS SHE’S ALWAYS STALKED ME THROUGHOUT 5 YEARS OF US TOGETHER. Considering she has committed infidelity before I can’t see any reason why she would be stalking ME Claims she’s not jealous and all girls do these things and is being very upset that I won’t talk to her. There are many other situations but I won’t live in the past. I don’t know where this is going but AM I THE ASSHOLE?!